


The Perfect Storm

by BronzeDragon13



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Adoption, Foster Care, Modern Era, Past Child Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-11-28
Packaged: 2019-04-19 19:17:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 29,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14243985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BronzeDragon13/pseuds/BronzeDragon13
Summary: Alexander Hamilton is barely managing. He's been shuffled from foster home to foster home, written off as a kid with too many problems, and on his way out of a group home with too many problems to list. When his case worker says he's being moved to Virginia, he convinces himself that it won't be any different. After all, Alexander was too much of an issue, who could ever actually want to keep him?





	1. Alexander Hamilton

**Author's Note:**

> I'm finally giving in. This type of story has been on my mind for weeks. So, here it is! 
> 
> Alexander is on his way to Virginia.

Alex sat stiffly in the back of the car. His case worker, Marcus, was driving and didn't seem bothered by the lack of conversation. In the beginning of his journey through the system, Alex hadn't been able to filter his thoughts. He would mention anything and everything that came to his mind. Marcus had rolled with it for the most part, but as the previous foster homes kept returning him, citing behavior problems and his lack of ability to shut up, Marcus started telling him to watch his mouth. By now, Alex was conditioned to only open his mouth if asked a direct question. Which wasn't often. 

"The Washington's are well versed in taking in children from the system. I told them about you past, including the behavior warnings, and they still want to take you in. You'd do well to be grateful for that, I don't know of any kids being kicked out of a group home so quickly." Marcus said. Alex rolled his eyes at that comment. If only Marcus knew that several of the other kids there had made moves to seriously hurt him. Or that one of the workers there had been cornering him and leaving lingering touches and looks. From that point on, Alex slept under his bed, clutching a butter knife he had swiped, always prepared. 

"Are you even listening to me?" Marcus interrupted his thoughts. The older man was glaring at him through the rear view window. He still wasn't use to driving in cars, they made him uneasy, he preferred walking. However, you couldn't walk from New York to Virginia. Marcus might have let him if it meant that the case worker would be free of him. There were other kids out there that didn't cause much trouble or give too many headaches. Alex could have been one of those kids, but he wasn't. Maybe that was way he was being shipped off. Marcus was likely to not be his case worker for much longer. 

"Yes, I have to be careful to not screw this up." Alex parroted back. Marcus stared at him for a moment, which made his skin crawl, and then nodded. Alex leaned his head against the window, letting the vibrations go through his body, igniting some old bruises that had yet to fade. The worst ones were around his elbows and back. Alex could fight, but not when he was significantly outnumbered. Group homes were like that; either you found a group to fit in with, or you were left on your own, making yourself a target. Alex had a bright red target on his back from day one there. 

The rest of the drive went like that, Marcus lecturing him on not screwing up, and Alex letting his words wash over him. They stopped for lunch, some random sandwich place, and Alex nibbled at him food. Consistent meals were not something he was used to, comfortable at the fact that as long as he got something to consume once a day he would be ok. the only constant in his life was coffee, hot or cold, and Marcus said nothing was he ordered that first. Marcus didn't say much to him anymore about taking care of himself. 

Once, Alex might have seen Marcus as someone he could trust, someone he could confide in. For a long time Marcus was the only adult in his life that came back once he came to the states. Now, seeing Marcus didn't bring relief. It was a feeling of swallowing back acid, of knowing that he had, once again, screwed up. That he wasn't enough for whatever couple had taken him in. It was disheartening, but now Alex had come to rely on that feeling. It was safer to be alone, to not let anyone in. At least then the hurt and pain was limited to a certain time frame. 

Maybe that was how he was approaching living with the Washington's. He wouldn't be there long, maybe a few months at most, then he would be thrown back to the mercy of the system. He was just a few weeks shy of his 14th birthday. Internally, he was counting down the days until he was 18, free to leave, to run somewhere were none of the past demons could find him. He still bore the scar on his hip from the first, and only, attempt at running away. 

The Johnsons had seemed nice in the beginning, all wholesome and kind. They had been Alex's third foster family. While the first two had never layed a hand on him, they hadn't been overly warm, and most times Alex felt like an intruder in their home and lives. But the Johnsons seemed to care, asking about his interests, and making Marcus believe that this would be a good fit. It wasn't a good fit. The abuse didn't start right away, but it starting happening about a few weeks in. 

Limits on food he could eat and when. Being told to stay in the house, mostly his room, but if he misbehaved then he was ushered into the closet and kept there for several hours. Mister Johnson was cruel, lashing out at random times, sometimes throwing objects at him or actually hitting him with his fists. Mrs. Johnson would say things to him, calling him a waste of space, worthless, and too much effort. She had tried to push him down the stairs, once, and he had ended up with two broken fingers. He fixed them himself, using the computers at school, and convinced the nurse to give him bandages when he said he jammed the digets during gym class. 

It was approaching on five months when Alex hit his breaking point. Mister Johnson had been drinking. He was scary enough that even his wife was hiding from him, locked up tight in the master bedroom. Alex didn't have a lock on his door. He still wasn't clear on what happened that night. Mister Johnson had come in, reeking of alcohol, and tried to grab him. Alex had made it out to the hall, but something struck him, most likely a beer bottle, and cut his skin. 

He had made it to a 24 hour gas station, but was quickly returned to the couple. Several days later he was leaving with Marcus, having been cited as unruly and difficult to work with. The nightmares had been hard to work through, but now he could wake up from one without screaming out anymore. It was also why he never unpacked his meager belongs anymore; he was always ready to leave. At the past two houses he hadn't even opened the dresser drawers. The closet was also ignored. 

It was dark when Marcus pulled off the highway and onto some of the main roads. Knowing that they were getting closer to the destination, Alex tried to calm his rolling stomach. With any luck these people would just ignore him, only occasionally glancing his way. The best thing he could hope for was a lock on his door. The homes were big and fancy, clearly costing a ton of money, and Alex already felt out of place. 

His clothes, while clean, were worn out and patched up in some parts. His shoes were getting too small for him, the sole almost worn down, and if it rained they got soaked. He didn't have a winter coat, or a hat, and he was used to wearing mismatched socks since he had either lost one or used it to repair his other clothing. His hair was long, never in any other style then a bun or ponytail, since he didn't have money for regualr haircuts. He also didn't trust anyone else to cut it. Scissors near his neck creeped him out, especially by someone that had been previously in charge of him. 

They pulled into the driveway, which was lined with trees, and Alex hunched in his seat. He wouldn't fit in here. What if the Washingtons didn't even take him, just gave him back to Marcus. Marcus parked the car and got out, knocking on the window to signal to Alex that he should as well. The trunk was opened and Marcus held out his duffle bag. It wasn't heavy, just containing his clothing, some meager toilettries, and one lone notebook. He had swiped it from one of the schools. 

Marcus had a tight grip on his arm, pulling him up the walkway, almost as if he was going to run away. Not that Alex was going to. He had nowhere to go, there was no safe place for him. When Marcus rang the door bell, Alex fidgeted. He tried to pull his arm away, but Marcus only gripped tighter. Alex held back a wince and looked at his shoes. He cited his rules in his head as they waited. Don't open your mouth, don't wander in the house, don't ask for things that haven't already been offered to you. 

A woman opened the door, she looked nice enough, but it was the nice ones that he needed to worry about. They took longer to snap and when they did it was worse. "Good evening, Mrs. Washington, I apologize for the delay, traffic was more than I was expecting." The woman didn't seem annoyed at all. Alex could feel her eyes on him. "I'm Marcus, Alex's case worker, we spoke on the phone." They went through the introductions which Alex spaced out for. 

"And this is Alexander Hamilton." Marcus said, gesturing to him. Mrs. Washington smiled at him and Alex glanced down, not returning it. "He tends to be quiet, but he does act up. If that's the case, just remind him that this is his last chance, and I won't be around to fix his messes anymore." Alex cringed, fighting a burn of tears in his eyes. Marcus was never this cruel when he was being dropped off. 

"I'm sure that that will not be necessary, Marcus." Mrs. Washington said. She sounded mad, and Alex panicked, wondering how she could be anger already. He hadn't even been here long! "Now, I'm sure Alex has postive traits and I would rather hear about those." She turned to face him. "Come on in, Alexander, you must be tired. We can talk inside with my husband." They followed her into the house, which was nicer (and more expensive) inside that the outside of the home. 

He sat sitffly on one of the chairs, trying to ignore the glare of warning Marcus was giving him. He would try to not screw this up. He had to. Marcus wasn't going to fix it, as he said, and that scared him more than he was going to admit. Some new case worker would probably set in, only having Marcus's word to go off of. Mrs. Washington put on the kettle, calling down for her husband. There was a picutre of another kid on the fridge. Maybe another foster kid? 

"George will be down shortly. I know you have a drive ahead of you, Marcus, so we'll keep this short, yes?" Alex didn't respond, just kept looking at his feet, trying to hold back tears.


	2. Aaron Burr, Sir

Martha had always known that she wanted children. However, it seemed that biology was not on her side, and for years her and George had tried before begin pronounced as infertile. That was a hard thing to work through; George had been patient, but she could see how it hurt him, to see her crying when she thought he couldn't see. When they had decided to adopt, they were skeptical, knowing how hard it would be to find a child that was the right fit. 

Turns out it wasn't that hard. Gilbert came to them six years ago, a little child, and now he was a healthy teenager. He filled their quiet house up with noise, mostly songs that changed constantly, and soon he invited his own friends over. George laughed when he would come home, seeing all the shoes and books and teens sprawled out on various furniture, and claim that he never thought the house would have so many kids in it. After the adoption, they didn't think about children for a long time. Not until a few weeks ago, when they received a call from the fostering agency they went through when fostering, and later adopting, Gilbert. The case manager talked to them about a boy who was being transferred to the Virginia system and needed a decent home. 

Alexander was clearly a traumatized boy, bouncing from home to home, never settling down, and always being removed for one reason or another. Judging from the tone of the case manager, it seemed like it was more of the type of foster parents and environment than Alexander's fault. George and her had discussed it at length before agreeing to take on the child. She wasn't sure if it would end with an adoption, but she was open to the idea. Gilbert was also thrilled. The idea of being a big brother was exciting, but Martha wanted to take it slow.

That was why her son was over at Hercules house for the night, which would give them a chance to get Alexander settled. However, when she answered the door, all her previous thoughts went out the window. The child was clearly underweight, barely filling out the limp clothes on his body. It didn't escape her that his case worker was gripping him tightly, and she made a point to seperate the two in the hallway. Alexander looked at her for a moment, as if he was trying to see the motive for her doing so, and then looked back down at the floor. Martha forced herself to be patient; Alexander had a trauma history for sure, so until she learned the ins-and-outs of his background, she would take it slow. Trust had to be earned, after all. 

Alexander had surely learned the hard way to not willingly give his trust away. 

Now, sitting in the kitchen, she could tell that Alexander was just barely keeping calm. Sitting stiffly in the chair, she could tell that her every movement was being watched. The man, Marcus was impatiently texting on his phone. George came down the stairs, giving her a smile and a kiss on the cheek, before turning to their guests. Marcus looked up and his entire expression seemed bored. Alexander, on the other hand, went white when her husband walked in. 

"Hello Alexander," George said calmly. "It's nice to finally meet you." Wisely, George didn't stick his hand out to shake; Alexander seemed like he would bolt at the first indication of human contact. Marcus huffed and pulled out a small stack of files. 

"Yes, very nice to meet you. Now, since all of us are here, we need to move this along." Grabbing a pen, Marcus flipped open a page and marked several areas that needed to be signed. "He's already been processed through the state, and his new case worker will be checking in with you sometime this week. She'll help you if there are any problems." He glanced at the adolescent. "Which there won't be, right, Alexander?" 

"Yes, sir." Alexander said. The boy looked defeated already, as if he was expecting to be kicked out. Martha wasn't going to address it tonight, but they would sit down with Alexander just to bring him up to speed. They didn't give up with Gilbert, and his array of issues prior to coming to live with them, so they wouldn't with Alexander. She was already imagining how Gilbert would take the other boy under his wing. In no time, perhaps, they would have two energetic children running around the house. 

"I'm sure what he means is that if you have any questions, Alexander, that someone will be in contact with us soon. Is that what you meant?" George said. It didn't escape her knowledge that her husband let a little bit of his Senator voice slip in. Marcus, as if sensing a shift in the mood, hastily nodded. They went on, signing each line, and then collecting all the various papers needed for Alexander to stay here. The first check-in would be within the week, and then it would be up to the case worker to determine the frequency of supervision from then on. 

"That's all of it." Marcus pakced up his stuff. He turned to Alexander and clasped his shoulder. "I'm sure you'll keep my warning in mind, Alexander. Don't mess this up." He turned to the Washingtons. "Pleasure meeting you, hope he works out for you." And with that he was gone. Alexander, who had been starring at the door his old case worker just walked out of, looked at the floor, digging the nails of his fingers into his palms. 

"Alexander, would you like to get settled in your room? We can talk about ground rules once you've unpacked." George said gently. Alexander just nodded, and stiffly got up. His hand was gripping the strap of his bag, as if it was all he had to hold on to, and followed her husband out of the kitchen. Martha followed and tried to start up a conversation to get the boy to open up. 

"We have a son that lives here as well. His name is Gilbert, but he prefers Lafeyette, as I'm sure he'll tell you when you meet tomorrow." Martha explained. "His room is just down the hall. We figured that since you're still adjusting, the room next to his would be a good fit. He's a few years older than you, but he's very excited." 

"Have you taken in anyone else?" Martha felt elated that she had gotten a question out of him. 

"No, not since we adopted Gilbert. You're our second foster child." She put a single finger under his chin, trying hard not to seeth when Alexander flinched. "We are so happy to have you here, Alexander, regardless of how many children have come before you. I'm just trying to tell you a bit about us so that you aren't left in the dark." Had Alexander known he was coming to a new state? Did he know that he was being placed with a new family, let alone one that included a prominent senator? 

"My wife tends to be a bit of a worrier, Alexander, being a house full of men does that to her." George teased. He opened the room they set aside for their new family member. Alexander went in, skirting past George, and his mouth dropped slightly at the room. 

"Do you like it? We can go out and get some paint later this weekend, if you want? Same with room decorations. We didn't go too elaborate since we didn't know what you would like." Martha could tell he was a bit overwhelmed, and Alexander curled into himself. 

"This is huge. It's all mine?" The room wasn't crammed with items, just a comfortable bed, dresser, and desk. There was a window seat in the far corner, and a bathroom attached to the room. 

"Yes, we know how much growing young men need their space." George explained. "This room is your space, Alexander, however you choose to decorate and use. We give you privacy, and if we need to check in on you, we knock first before entering. Does that sound alright?" It took a few moments before their young charge responded. The head nod was jerky at best. 

"I'm going to order in, does that sound alright to you two?" George asked. Alexander still had a stunned look on his face. "Are you a fan of pizza, Alexander?" 

"I like cheese pizza, sir." Alexander replied after a moment. Martha smiled. They were making progress.

"Cheese it is then." George said. "You don't need to call me sir, Alexander, George works just fine, alright." He didn't get a verbal answer this time. Martha moved into the room to show the closet space, and the extra storage under the window seat. She was pointing out the bathroom system when she was cut off. 

"Alex." 

"What, dear?" Martha said as she turned away from the shower. 

"I like being called Alex, not Alexander." He was shaking as he said this, as if he was expecting to be punished for speaking up. Martha wanted to find the people responsible and discover why they would ever harm a child in such a way. 

"That's perfectly fine, Alex. We won't use your full name while you're here, does that sound alright?" Martha clarified. Alex nodded. "Good. I'll let George know when I go downstairs. Why don't you take some time to unpack and relax? It must have been such a long drive for you." Alex shrugged. "Well, you take as much time as you need. There's hot water and clean towels in the bathroom, and if you need help with anything else you just ask. I'll come get you when the food arrives, okay?" 

She left Alex to sort his belongings out, already making a list of the things the boy would need, as she desended downstairs. George was sitting at the kitchen counter staring at the stakc of files. 

"He's better with us, Martha." George said after a moment. "I don't know the whole story, but Alexander is better off here than with another family." 

"Alex, dear, he doesn't want to go by his full name." Martha corrected him. "I said I would tell you." 

"He's afraid of me." George realized. 

"I think he's scared of all of this, George. But, we'll work on it. Gilbery already has some ideas, and I know the other boys are dying to meet him. Let's just go one day at a time, shall we?" Martha suggested. George took her hand and kissed the back of it. 

"We shall, my dear, I guess we shall." With that the two settled in to wait for the pizza delivery. They both listened for the sounds of their new foster son.


	3. My Shot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The boys finally meet!

The first night had been odd for Alex. He was fed, and even allowed more than one slice of pizza, before going upstairs to his new room. There was a lock on the door that he used, not trusting the two adults yet, and he slept fitfully. The room seemed too large for him to relax in, and halfway through the night he got up out of the fancy bed and curled up on the floor. A simple blanket and pillow served to make the ground more comfortable. He was used to sleeping on hard surfaces, not every house had enough beds and certainly not the group home, so Alex didn't care much when he woke up the next morning to a sore back. At least Mr. Washington hadn't tried to visit him. He would keep his mouth closed, always lock the door, and figure out the easiest ways to leave if it came to that. He hoped it wouldn't; the first time one of the foster adults had tried to touch him, Alex and kicked him in the face. Three days later he was taken from the home. Marcus didn't believe him.

Now, sitting at the kitchen table, watching Mrs. Washington bustle around making coffee and pancakes, and Mr. Washington flipping through the paper, Alex was only more on edge. There had to be something wrong with this situation, a button that would send everything into a tailspin. Every family had one, he was just going to have to wait to see what it was or endure it once he inevitably pressed it. With any luck the other kid would tell him. "Alex, would you like some coffee, dear? There's sugar on the table and milk in the fridge." He cautiously made his way to the countertop, pouring the hot drink into the mug, and quickly spooned in three sugars. His hand shook when he poured the milk, and he quickly wiped up a few stray drops with his sleeve. He hoped that neither of the adults had seen. Holding onto the mug with both hands, Alex sat back down. 

Mrs. Washington was just putting the pancakes on the table when the front door opened. Alex flinched a little at the loud sound, something that did not go unnoticed by the married couple, and stared as an older boy walked in. His hair was up in a messy bun, and the outfit was a bit of a confusing mess for Alex to understand. The fancy t-shirt, the ripped jeans, and the tall, glossy boots didn't make much sense to him. "Morning!" The boy said, stopping to press a kiss to Mrs. Washington's cheek and a hug for Mr. Washington. "Ah, you must be Alexander! C'est un plaisir de vous rencontrer!" Alex swallowed and looked down. Maybe the boy wouldn't help him. Not if he was close to the Washington's. Maybe they would use the other boy to keep him in line, make sure he didn't do anything. Alex kept his focus on his mug and hunched his shoulders, trying to curl into himself. 

"Alex, this is Layfette, our son. He's harmless, dear, you don't have to be afraid of him." Mrs. Washington said. If Alex was paying attention, he would have seen the concerned look on the older woman's face, as a similar one matched her husband and son. "Nice to meet you." Alex said finally. Suddenly, he wasn't hungry anymore. Even the coffee wasn't sitting right in his stomach. Layfette sat down, and soon breakfast was underway. Alex forced himself to eat one of the pancakes on his place, and sat quietly when he was done. Mr. Washington and Layfette were in the middle of a conversation, and asking to be excused in the middle of their talk would have been hard to do in his current state of anxiety. He pushed the other pancake around his plate, slowly sipping his now cold coffee. Mrs. Washington had offered to warm it up for him, but he said no. There wasn't a reason to be greedy. 

"I was thinking that we should go out to the stores today." Mr. Washington said as he got his fourth pancake. "Alex needs some clothes, and we need to get him a phone and things for school." Alex's stomach dropped. "I don't need anything!" Alex blurted out. Three sets of eyes zoned in on him, and Alex could feel himself go pale. "R-really, I don't need anything, please, we don't need to go shopping." His heart was racing, mind already seeing the expensive costs associated with a shopping trip. He didn't have any money, only a few crumpled up single dollar bills. Nothing that could be put towards any decent clothing or a new phone. Besides, it wasn't as if he would be staying long. The phone would be a wasted expense and the clothes would probably just end up being returned or donated. Alex certainly wouldn't be taking them with him; new clothing was a sure way to get beaten up.

Mr. Washington frowned. "Alex, it's alright. We just want to make sure that you have everything you need, that's our job. Besides, Gilbert here is a good bargain hunter. He's been looking forward to this since we told him you were coming." That didn't calm him down in the least. All he could picture was the giant store, the prices that he couldn't pay for, and being told that he wasn't staying long enough to enjoy or use any of the items. Alex shook his head, pushing his plate away from him as his stomach rolled. He couldn't throw up on the table, then he might really be kicked out. The table cloth probably cost more than all his belongs put together. " Mon ami, tout va bien, please do not get upset." Layfette said as he watched Alex panic. Alex could feel himself start to shake, knowing that he couldn't afford anything, and that the Washington's didn't understand that. 

The final straw was Mrs. Washington placing her hand on his arm, trying to get him to calm down. He bolted, sending his chair to the floor, as he sprinted up the stairs. Throwing himself into his room, after locking the door, he crumpled against the wood and cried. He could hear the thundering footsteps of someone coming up the stairs, but it felt so far away as his body gave in to the panic attack. Someone jiggled the doorknob and Alex scrambled to get away from the door. "Alex, honey, please open the door!" Mrs. Washington sounded concerned, but why would she be? How could he have been so stupid to think that she was nice? Catching his breath got harder as he curled up in between the small space by the bed and bedside table. Alex tried to block out the knocking, rocking back and forth, letting the tears slip down his face. 

He just wanted to be ok. He just wanted one of these homes to work out, to move along until he was 18 and could find his own way. It seemed like an eternity before he was anywhere close to normal again. He leaned his head against the side of the bed, pressing his cheek into the soft fabric of the comforter. He wondered who would be taking over the room once he left. Surely they would give him back after the stunt during breakfast. He was unsure of how long he stayed there, ignoring the voices behind the door. Why they hadn't left yet was beyond him. Alex knew he wasn't worth the effort or trouble, he had been told that dozens of times before. "Alex, puis-je entrer s'il vous plaît?" Layfette's voice was soft, and Alex sniffled as he knocked on the door. "Alex, please open the door. We just want to make sure that you are alright." 

It took several moments for him to make up his mind. No doubt they would keep pressing until he opened the door, or until they forced it open. A locked door could only withstand so much before giving in. He slowly uncurled and shuffled over to the door. With a quick flip of the wrist, he unlocked the door, and then took several steps back, bringing his hands up to his face to block any hits. But nothing happened. He lowered his arms and saw the Washington's standing there, both of them concerned and arms outstretched, like they were going in to comfort him, not hurt him. Layfette didn't hesitate like his parents. The boy moved until he was almost right in front of Alex. "Oh, my friend, it is alright. Everything is alright." And then he was actually beig hugged. His arms stayed against his chest, unsure of what to do, and remained stiff in the hold. 

'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ruin breakfast, I'm sorry." Alex said on autopilot. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Maybe the punishment was minor. He'd endured some pretty awful beatings, he could handle it. If he didn't show any emotion during it, they might get bored and leave him alone. A hand tilted his face up. Layfette looked at him, face showing no signs of anger, and moved to cup his cheek. Alex flinched away before allowing the hand to rest against his skin. "Alex, you did not ruin the meal. We just want to know what happened to make you so scared." And with that Alex looked down at the floor. "I can't pay for anything. Please don't make me go out shopping." He whispered. A gentle hand cupped the back of his hand and Layfette swayed from side to side, like he was trying to sooth Alex. "Oh mon petit Alex, tu n'as pas à te soucier de l'argent. Martha and George have put some aside for you." 

Alex wondered what he would have to do to pay back that money. He shook his head, figthing to get out of the hug, and backed up until he was more than an arms length away from the other boy. "I don't want it, please, don't waste it on me." Mrs. Washington came into the room, her husband right behind her, and Alex let out a whimper. This was it, this was the moment he would finally see what they had planned, how they handled disobedience. Layfette tried to grab his hand and that was all it took. Alex cried out, stumbling until he was back in his little space between the bed and table, and curled up with his hands over his head. His breaths came out is gasps and someone was trying to talk to him, calm him down, but he couldn't understand it. The words were not registering in his brain. Everything went out of focus. 

"-ex. Alex. Come on, son, listen to me. You need to breathe. Just breathe with me, ok? In through the nose, out through the mouth. Can you do that, Alex?" Mr. Washington's voice sounded close, but Alex didn't lift his head. He had been here less than 24 hours and he had already made a mess of things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know some of you guys have talked about updates. I can only post once a week (school sucks like that), so I'll try to post the new chapter as quickly as possible. 
> 
> c'est un plaisir de vous rencontrer: pleasure to meet you
> 
> Mon ami, tout va bien: my friend it is alright 
> 
> Alex, puis-je entrer s'il vous plaît?: Alex, can I come in please
> 
> Oh mon petit Alex, tu n'as pas à te soucier de l'argent: Oh my little Alex, you don't have to worry about money


	4. The Story of Tonight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Time for damage control

George had no idea how things had gone so wrong. One moment they were sitting at the table, eating, and George was almost able to convince himself that Alex was starting to settle in, even though he was still stiff and timid around them. Now, looking at his young charge, George knew that he had seriously miscalculated. Alex was curled up into the tiniest ball possible, his whole being screaming to not touch him, and all George could do was try to help him ride out the panic attack. No where in Alex's file did it mention that he suffered from panic attacks. Based on that brief conversation with Alex at breakfast, and all the nonverbal cues and communication now, George was beginning to think that Alex had been harmed for minor things. If he was this scared about the idea of getting basic necessities, even after he and Martha explained that Alex wouldn't have to worry about the cost, then what else had he been punished for in these previous homes? It took almost half an hour before Alex started to calm down. At that point, he had told Layfette to go to his room, and when Alex was feeling a bit better they could talk. Martha was seated on the ground behind him. She originally placed herself next to Alex, but the boy had flinched away. Now, they were several feet away from him, gently talking and soothing him, while fighting back their parental urges to reach out and comfort him. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. I'll pay for the stuff, I'm sorry." Alex said into his knees. George moved himself a few inches closer. "I'll do what you want, I'm sorry, I'll figure out how to pay for it all, I will." Martha shifted herself and blinked her eyes rapidly to rid herself of any tears. They had to focus on Alex right now; they could cry later about the situation once their newest son was taken care of and reassured. 

"Alex, look at me please." George asked softly. He waited patiently until Alex raised his head. His face was pale and covered with tears. His eyes jumped between the two adults in front of him and the door just beyond the small space he was occupying by the bed. "There won't be any reason for you to find a way to pay for these things. That is not your responsibility, alright Alex? That job, providing food, clothing, and anything else you need is what Martha and I are responsible for. You're a child, Alex, that should have never been a worry for you." Alex frowned, like he didn't understand, and George let the words sink in. Then, Alex shook his head and buried his face back into his knees. 

"You're lying. That's what the last place said, that they would handle it, and they never did!" The last part of the statement was shouted out, and Alex trembled as another gasp of crying began. George felt his stomach drop from it, knowing that Alex wouldn't take their words with any type of value, relying only on past experiences that showed him that adults didn't hold up their end. 

"I don't know who else neglected to provide for you, Alex, and those people should be held accountable. I can't do much with them now, but I can focus on you. We can give you the things you need, there isn't a need for you to worry about money, you just have to let us in." George was good at forming words, but this boy in front of him would need more convincing than that. Alex had been in the system for so long, was so cautious, and clearly had many, many scars from his time there. And just like that, George knew. 

He knew that there was no way he'd be able to give Alex up. He wouldn't accept another foster family, wouldn't trust that they could care for Alex. Granted, they had only had him under their roof for less than two days, but George wanted more. He wanted weeks, months, hell years with Alex. He wanted to bring this terrifed boy out of his shell. "I know you're scared Alex, and I can't imagine how awful that is, but please try to believe me when I say that Martha and I are not going to withhold things you need." 

"We should have talked to you about this in a different way," Martha cut in. "Why don't we hold off on the major shopping trip and just talk about the idea of getting you a couple of small items. Things like some comfortable clothes or stuff to decorate your room?" Alex didn't answer them for several minutes. He peered up, using one of his hands to wipe away some of the tears, and stared at them. Martha, being the saint that she was, got up and fetched the tissue box near the desk. Seating herself back on the floor, she held the box out to Alex. There seemed to be an entire conversation within that action, Alex staring his wife down and Martha gently staring back, before Alex reached out and took a tissue. Martha set the box down on the ground, closer to Alex, and gazed softly at him. 

"You aren't yelling." Alex said. The boy sounded so confused by that, and it made George angry, but he pushed it down. He would not show that side of himself to Alex, not now, not when the trust between the child and the adults was so tenious. 

"Alex, we talked about this. Nothing you did was wrong. Why would we yell when there is no reason too?" Martha asked. Alex shrugged. The boy seemd to be drained, and he listed off to the side, allowing the bed frame to keep him upright. 

"Everyone else yells. They said I need to learn to not talk back." Martha inched herself closer, and reached her hand out, leaving it up to Alex to take if he wanted it. 

"You didn't talk back, son, you got scared." George told him. He seethed at the flinch that accompined the word 'son'. "Why don't we do this instead. Let's get you more comfortable, find something that will help you relax, and then talk about this some more when you're ready. How does that sound?" Goerge let the suggestion hang for a moment. They had done this a lot too with Layfette in the beginning. Giving him choices, letting him know that he was in control of the situation. 

"Can I stay here?" Alex asked. They almost missed it since it was said so softly. Martha nodded. 

"Of course, dear, you don't have to leave your room. I'm sure you might be better off on the bed or window seat, but you can move when you're ready." Martha brushed her hair back, pulling it into a flawless bun, and leaned against the bed to mimic Alex. "Do you need anything, water or something to settle your stomach? You barely ate this morning." Another battle to take up, getting better eating habits for Alex, the boy was thinner than a rail, but that was a challenge for another day. So, when Alex refused food, but agreed to a cup of tea, George didn't push. 

He was tasked with going downstairs and making the tea, leaving his wife to get Alex better situated upstairs. Layfette was seated at the counter in the kitchen, phone going off frequently in his hand, and he zoned in on Goerge when he entered the room. 

"Is he ok?" Layfette shot out. George gave him a sad smile. 

"Still shaken up, but he's calming down. I know you planned a big shopping trip and wanted to introduce your friends to Alex, Layfette, but we need to hold off on it for now." His son deflated at that, he'd been looking forward to showing Alex off. George also knew that the other teens, John and Hercules in particular, were excited to meet the newest addition. "We need to find a better way to introduce suggestions to Alex. Framing the issue of getting him things needs to be first." Layfette picked at his nails.

"Can I get his size? Maybe if I go out and get him some things he won't be as stressed. I'll take the price tags off if he's still worried about those." George kept the suggestion in the back of his mind. It was a start at least. As Layfette informed the crew that their plans were on hold, George finished making the tea, settling on peppermint with the hopes that the scent and taste would calm Alex down. He pressed a kiss to the top of Layfette's head as he made his way for the stairs. 

He knocked on the door before he entered. Martha was seated on the edge of the bed, Alex curled up in the middle, and he regarded George with glazed over eyes. The kid was exhausted from earlier. 

"I made you peppermint tea, is that alright?" George asked as he put in on the bedside table. Alex shifted so he was sitting up, and Martha smoothed the comforter out after he was done. 

"Yes, that's ok Mr. Washington." George didn't try to bring up the topic of being on a first name basis. That would be another issue for another day. One where his charge wasn't so tired and hesitant to trust his words. 

"Alright. Get some rest. If you need anything just let one of us know." George knelt down so he wasn't towering over Alex in the bed. "Layfette is downstairs. I know he would like to see you, but I can tell him that he can come up later on." Layfette was most likely pacing downstairs, frustrated that he couldn't do anything to help. Seeing Alex would be good, but he wasn't about to force Alex to see anyone if he didn't want to. Layfette would understand. Alex didn't even know that he had some many people in his corner, half of them he hadn't even met yet. 

"He can come up, I don't mind." Alex rasped out. George nodded and went to go fetch his son as Alex sipped on his tea. When he told Layfette that he could go see Alex, his son was shooting out of his seat and racing up the stairs. The cry to be careful hadn't even left his mouth before his son was gone. Chuckling, George went to work clearing off the table, giving his kids space to talk. He looked at the file on the counter, and sighing, George picked it up and headed for the office. 

He needed to know what types of horrors Alex had experienced to make him so fearful. What could have happened that would make him so scared to ask questions or say no? If he thought that even the simple necessities like clothing wouldn't be provided, what else had Alex been denied? Worse, what else was withheld from Alex that he now associated with being acceptable?

That thought sickened his stomach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another installment! Enjoy!


	5. The Schuyler Sisters

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The boys talk and Alex discusses some of his past.

Lafayette tried not to get angry a lot. He knew that rational people (or so he had been told) did not cave in to such feelings of rage, but it was hard not to when he saw his little brother curled up on his bed. Alex looked uncomfortable there, like he wasn't used to laying on a bed, and Mom was trying her best to make him feel better. In the corner of the room she had lit a candle (fresh cotton) and the shades had been closed in the event that Alex wanted to go back to sleep for a few hours. The tea that Dad had made was clutched in Alex's hands, and he occasionally took a few sips. Lafayette knew that Alex would be shy in the beginning, but he had no clue that others had been so harmful to him. He had been lucky, or so he had been told by the few other foster care children he had encountered, to find such nice parents and then be adopted by them. There would be no 'next stop' for him, he wouldn't be passed around like another thing taking up space, and his hope was that Alex wouldn't have to face that fear anymore. 

The Washington's were upfront when they told him that Alex would be coming to live with them. They we're sure about his past history, only that New York had been rough on him, and all options for him had been exhausted leaving him at the mercy of another state. Judging from the wariness in Alex's eyes, the way he seemed to hunch his shoulder, almost like he was trying to disappear, the system had chewed up enough of him. If he was so concerned about money for basic needs then what other horrors had Alex experienced? Mom smiled at him once she saw him standing there and smoothed down the blankets on the bed. Alex was clearly unsure of how to deal with it, as if he hadn't had anyone fuss over him, and Lafayette was angry all over again. Past trauma or no, he was not about to let Alex think that he was unwelcome here or that getting scared was a punishable offense. If anything, he would reassure his new brother and then go argue with Jefferson or Burr. 

The thought of his friends made him smile, and then he cleared his head. The group would meet Alex when it was time, when Alex was a bit more secure here, and then he could see just how good living here could be for him. Seeing that she had done everything possible for the moment, Mom got up and smiled at Alex. 

"I'll let you two talk. If you need anything just call, alright?" Mom said. Alex nodded and his eyes dropped back to the mug clasped between his hands. She walked over to Lafayette and pressed a kiss to his cheek. "Be gentle with him." She warned in a low voice. Patting him on the shoulder she left the two alone. 

"You have weird punishments here." Alex blurted out. He wasn't looking at the other boy, just staring blankly ahead, and Lafayette walked over and took over Mom's spot. 

"They wouldn't have punished you for a panic attack." He countered. He might have spent his time in the kitchen researching about panic attacks, what to do, and anything else that might be helpful. "Did someone do that to you in that past?" Lafayette threw out. Alex flinched.

"I don't want to talk about that." The sentence was so flat, so devoid of any emotion, but he could easily see the pain in Alex's body language. Clearly the attacks were something Alex had dealt with before and someone, or more than one person, had said something to make Alex think that it was wrong. 

"Ok, we don't have to, mon ami. Is there anything you would like to talk about?" He offered. Alex shrugged and took another sip of his tea. "Talking about things might be hard for you, Alex, but just know that any of us will listen to you. We will not try to cause you pain or fear intentionally." Neither of them said anything, Lafayette staring at Alex and Alex staring at his mug. 

"One of my first homes said that too. That they wouldn't use what I told them against me." His fingers clenched around the mug. "It was a lie. They used any weakness against me. It wasn't done right away. Lots of times they would just wait a couple of weeks then bring it back up. Didn't matter if it was a big or small thing." Alex shifted on the bed, pulling up towards the head of the bedframe, like he was trying to get away from Lafayette. "It was awful." He whispered. 

Hercules had once claimed that Lafayette had a larger than normal heart since he felt things so emotionally. He had done so when his parents had died in France, had done so when he was missing his homeland, and acted out during the whole foster and adoption process. He cared deeply about his family and friends, more so than he should have sometimes, but it was natural for him. For someone like Alex, who had learned to internalize any emotions, trust like this was huge. To tell a person, more like a stranger (since that was what Lafayette was to him at this point still) about a fear...it was the biggest show of trust Alex could give him. He leaned back in the bed, giving Alex lots of space, and then started to talk. 

"I broke a vase once. I'd been with the Washington's for a few months, this was before they started the adoption process, and this was the first time I'd done something like that. I thought that I would be in huge trouble, so I hid the shards and holed up in my room. They found out, I am not the best liar, and I freaked out. Crying and everything. But they didn't punish me. Dad told me it was a mistake and that vases could be replaced. I was more important." Lafayette smiled helplessly at Alex who was watching with avid eyes. "They won't punish you like that here. Not with their fists, or by using your mistakes against you." Alex didn't respond at first then he sniffled. 

"I'm just tried of it. Of feeling like I'm walking on eggshells all the time." Alex said in a hoarse voice. "I want to believe you, but I can't. Not when I'm probably going to be somewhere else in a couple of weeks. Thinking like that is dangerous." He placed the mug on the bedside table and rolled part of the comforter in his hands. "I think I'll try to sleep for a bit." It came out like a question, like Alex was unsure if he could ask Lafayette to leave his room. Lafayette nodded. 

"Of course, you must be tired." Standing up, Lafayette fiddled with his hands. "You will not have to, how you say, walk on eggshells here. You are safe here." Alex didn't say anything, just sunk until only his head and neck were showing, and closed his eyes. He crept out of the room, closing it softly behind him, and shuffled down the stairs. His parents were in the living room, looking worried, and Lafayette could sympathize with then. There was a list of unnamed people on his shit list. 

"He is resting. Alex also seems to be under the impression that showing any weakness will be used against him. That is why he didn't want us to see the panic attack." Lafayette bit his lip. "I feel that others have used things like this against him in the past, which might be why he is so hesitant to relax around us." 

Dad scowled, looking like he did when other members of the Senate didn't listen to common reasoning. "I've been looking through his file. There are hints of emotional abuse in there, as well as neglect." In other words, Alex had some scars from his past which made him slow to trust anyone. Having three new people coming to tell him that he was safe and that they cared probably wasn't the best. "I'm calling the offices tomorrow. I want Alex here for the long term." 

Lafayette left them to discussing the details and wandered off to the back porch. It was a bit chilly outside and he wished he brought a jacket out. Flipping out his phone, which was blown up with messages, he opened a group message. 

To: John, Hercules, Aaron, Thomas, James, Eliza, Angelica, Peggy

Alex is doing better. Hold off on any party ideas. 

HIs friends were excited to meet the newest member, and he hoped that they would see his warnings and heed them. There was no telling how Alex would react if more strangers came around. 

From: Angelica

Oh my gosh good! What happened?? Did he get hurt?? 

The oldest of the Schuyler sisters tended to be a mother hen. And given the fact that Alex was several years younger than the rest of them wasn't helping matters. Peggy was excited that she wasn't going to be the baby of the group anymore. 

To: Angelica 

Panic attack. I won't go into details just know that we are holding off introducing anyone new at the moment. Also, I might need volunteers for kicking some asses later.

From: Hercules 

I'm in for some good old ass kicking. 

From: John

Who messed up? 

From: Aaron

I won't help but I will get the laywers on standby.

Shaking at his friends, he quickly typed out that he didn't have names (yet) but rest assured once Alex gave them they would go. He was tempted to go look through the file, but he decided not too. Alex had given him a small ounce of trust today; he would not ruin that by snooping around just because he was angry. The group message blew up over ideas on what to do for the nameless people, how Alex was doing, what he was like, ect. Eliza was particually interested, wanting to know if Alex needed anything. 

Mom called him in an hour later, berating him for being outside without being properly dressed, and did that weird, eye commanding thing that had him scuttling upstairs to put on clothes. He peeked into Alex's room, and relaxed a bit when he saw his little brother asleep in the same position that he left him in. Dad was in the office with the door closed. If he listned carefully, Lafayette could hear him arguing with someone. Probably the foster care agency. 

He liked the idea of Alex staying here forever. Well, maybe not forever (yet), but definetly for longer than the few weeks Alex thought he'd be allowed to stay. There was no way he could let the younger boy leave, not after learning the small amount of backstory Alex had shown. Yes, Alex would stay here and Lafayette would decimate anyone who tried to stop that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more final to go! Also, I just noticed that my laptop has been autocorrecting Lafayette's name...god damn it. Well, read and enjoy!


	6. Farmer Refuted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex is starting to settle in with the Washington's.

Living with the Washington's was a weird experience for Alex. First, they didn't seem mad when he got anxious, or when he asked dozens of questions, or when he froze, trembling, because someone had moved too quickly. Lafayette was becoming quite good at sensing when he was getting overwhelmed, gently steering the conversation and attention away from Alex, so he could have time to compose himself in peace. Alex was grateful, more than he could possibly say to the older boy, and he tried loads of times to get the words out. Lafayette told him not to worry, that the French speaking teen understood, and when Alex was ready he could use as many words as he liked. Martha had developed an obsession with getting more food into him, slowly encouraging him to speak up when he was hungry, and showing him where everything was in the kitchen so he would feel more at home. She also brought up the notion that Alex would be going in to see the family doctor before school picked up again. Martha (he only called her by her first name in his mind, she was Mrs. Washington still in public and at the house) was worried about his weight, his sleeping habits, or lack of sleeping habits, and his panic and anxiety attacks, which only seemed to increase since the first episode. George (same name problem as his wife) was...strange. He made it a point to not raise his voice, or at least make sure Alex was out of earshot or informed that whatever the problem was wasn't his fault. The file that Alex came with had a safe spot in the office, which he had been shown within the first week of his arrival. That was another thing Alex was unnerved with. He had been with the Washington's for a month now and they hadn't even mentioned the idea of sending him back or passing him off to the next foster family on the list. If anything, they were trying to make sure that he stayed with them for the long term. His new case worker, Maria Reynolds, had introduced herself, and he already liked her better than his old one, Marcus. 

Maria had been a case worker for the past decade, was well known in the legal system, and had a soft spot for all the kids that came into her life. She immediately set Alex at ease, gently easing him into conversation, and making sure she had all the details right before asking him any serious questions. Her prime concern was asking him what he wanted, if he liked staying with the Washington's, if they treated him right and fairly, if he could see himself there for a longer period. 

"How long would I be able to stay?" Alex had asked her, not sure how to voice his confusion, but he was sure she picked up on it anyway. Maria smiled at him. "I mean, don't I have to get moved at some point?" That was the sad fact for any kid he had encountered; it didn't matter how long you stayed, you always ended up getting moved. Longer stays meant adoption, and Alex knew he was far past the point of being taken in permanently.

"Well, George and Martha enjoy having you in their home. You get along well with their son, and all of the them are in agreement that having you stay with them as long as possible would benefit you in the long run. Neither of them have expressed any desire to shorten your time there. If anything, they want to make sure you know that you can remain with them for the foreseeable future." Maria spoke confidently about that, like those words held actually worth to them, and Alex was stunned. No one had ever fought to keep him with them. They always wanted him gone as soon as possible. 

Alex was bursting with questions by the time his meeting with Maria was over. Martha, who had driven him to the foster care offices, seemed to sense his restlessness, and left the radio off. Alex took the opportunity to speak, knowing that he was more open to talking with the only female in the family. Not that George or Lafayette were frightening, but they could be intimidating at times without meaning too. Martha kept her attention on the road, glancing at Alex when she thought he wasn't looking and kept a steady stream of mindless conversation going as Alex built up his nerve. She talked about some of the attractions around the house, if Alex needed a warmer coat, was he hungry and if he was they could stop somewhere to pick him up something. That was the thing about Martha that he had noticed in the beginning. She never forced him to spew his thoughts. She understood that talking for Alex, really talking, was hard. That he had, in the past, spoken up only to be shut down for it, or worse, punished for even opening his mouth. And while the Washington's or Lafayette had never raised a hand to harm him, only to comfort if it was welcomed by him, old habits died hard. Living with the nice (probably the nicest family he had been with for years) did not erase all of the horrible encounters in his past. So, Martha rambled about things that were minor and pointless, while Alex collected his thoughts and tried to get his tongue to work right. 

"Do you really want me to stay for a long time? You actually like having me around?" Alex burst out. Martha startled a bit, thankfully they were at a red light, and she looked over at Alex. He broke eye contact and started to pick at his cuticles, a nervous tick of his that began somewhere around his third or fourth placement. 

"Yes, Alex, we would love it if you stayed with us. We enjoy having you in the home, you get along well with Lafayette, and seeing you coming out of your shell more has been such a pleasure. We would be fools to let you go so soon." Martha expressed. Alex frowned a bit, looking for the lie, but he couldn't find it so he sagged back into the seat. Martha pressed the gas peddle and the car began moving again. 

"Does your husband feel the same way?" He asked timidly. Sometimes the wives wanted to keep him around, but their husband would refuse, leaving Alex to think that most of the want was one sided. It didn't appear that way, and Maria had seemed sincere talking about the married couple, but Alex figured he would check anyway. Just to be sure that it wasn't a ruse or a pipe dream. 

Martha explained that George was the one that brought it, claiming that moving Alex so soon before he got settled would be detrimental. She also pointed out that her husband did not feel comfortable sending him off to live with another family that might not be equipped to handle his needs, which only proved his point when Alex had his first panic attack after being with them for a day. She brought up how Lafayette was enjoying being a big brother, that he wanted to show Alex that things could, and would, get better with time. Martha even talked about how she enjoyed caring for him, from making countless meals, endless worrying over his needs, and embarking on discussions about Alex's hopes and dreams. The three of them wanted to get to know him, wanted to bring out the bright young boy that was clearly hidden beneath the surface of past hurts and fears. Of course, Martha concluded, that couldn't happen if they allowed another family to take him in. Alex, reeling a bit from that revelation, nodded numbly along, soaking it all in, but unable to register what it all meant. 

"Do you really enjoy having me around?" Alex asked when he was sitting in Lafayette's room. The older boy had made it a point to open his space up to Alex, telling him to come on in whenever he wanted to and make himself comfy. 

"Oui! You are fun to talk to, you act interested when I go on my fashion rambles." That part got an eye roll and Lafayette mentally threw his fists up in victory. "You care, mon ami, you offer yourself up to people even when you have been wronged in the past. To not take notice of such a special person would be foolish. Like throwing away a, how you say, a diamond. You are a diamond, Alex." Lafayette was doing that more after their heart to heart following his panic attack. Slowly, the French boy was building his non-existent self-esteem back up. 

Now, laying on his bed, stomach full from dinner, and feeling quite safe in his room, Alex started to think more on the idea that this might be a good fit. He might actually be happy here. It was still too early for a lot of things, like calling the Washington's by their first names, or expressing to Lafayette just how grateful he was for his concern, but he could let himself have this. He could imagine a life here, one where the adults actually gave a damn about him, one where his foster sibling was not out to throw him under the bus, and one where he was not being kept around because it was his only option. The Washington's wanted him around solely because they enjoyed having him. Alex, who had been told he was worthless so many times, was wanted by someone. 

The way it was explained to him once they had gotten home was that Alex was now listed as a long-term placement. He would stay with the Washington's for a period of six months, providing there was no serious problems or concerns, and if everything was going well that period could be renewed. Maria showed no lack of faith towards the Washington's, claiming that Alex couldn't have been placed with a better family. Alex hadn't been brave enough to ask about the topic of adoption, figuring it was better to not look a gift horse in the mouth. He'd been given so much already it might be greedy. 

Falling asleep was easier to do now. At least here, in this room, Alex didn't spend half the night in terror, wondering if the door would be enough to stop his abuser from coming in. He wasn't curled up in the corner anymore, Lafayette had caught him once, and then spent the next week in Alex's room, ensuring he slept on his bed. Even the nightmares had abaded for a bit, only happening several times a week. 

Curling up tighter in the blankets, breathing in the scent of the lavander laundry detergent Martha used, Alex tried to convince himself not to get his hopes up too high. But maybe...maybe...this could actually work out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another installment. Sometimes I might jump forward in time, or stay focused on a select few days. Leave a kudos or comment if you choose to do so :)


	7. You'll Be Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Layfette decides to introduce Alex to a couple of his friends.

There was a certain level of silence in the Washington's house. It wasn't oppressive, not like others he had been in, and it wasn't sad, again, like other places he had been living. George was out at work and would not be back till later that night. He was working on a big project and had spent the past few days going back and forth between his office downtown and the office on the second floor. Alex had the smallest urge to ask him what the project was about, but he held back, still not sure about his place here. While he was being encouraged to speak up more it was still an ongoing process. Some days were better than others, with the bad days seemingly coming out of nowhere, and Alex tried to ride them out the best he could. Usually Layfette found him when he was having a bad day, since he was still struggling with the whole idea of asking for help or comfort, and wouldn't leave him alone to his own devices. Alex wasn't sure if it was out of fear, for there had been some dark days in Alex's past but none that ever got him to that ledge, and the older boy never voiced his reasons. Again, Alex was faced with questions he that he wanted answers for and resolved to keep his mouth shut. Today was a decent day. He had managed to get some sleep, on the bed this time not the floor, and had eaten more than a few bites at breakfast. Martha was ecstatic and the smile never left her face as she bustled around the home. Layfette was on the other couch in the living room, typing away on his phone, and Alex tried to focus on his book. It was one of the few things he owned prior to coming here, an old collection of short stories that had weathered his passage through each foster home, so he could recite the words by memory at this point. He could ask for another book, something new and exciting to read, which wouldn't be hard since the Washington's had a fierce passion for the printed word. 

"We should go do something." Layfette said casually as he thumbed away at his phone screen. Alex caught sight of some sort of game, a bunch of birds it looked like, and swallowed. "It is a nice day and we should go out, get some fresh air, and, how you say, all that jazz." 

"Would that be alright?" Alex asked softly. He wasn't a fan of raising his voice, something the rest of the family had picked up on, and they didn't force him to adjust his volume, only repeat things as needed if they didn't quite catch it the first time. "Where would we go?" Layfette finally looked up from his device and gave a smile. Alex didn't return, not when he didn't know why the boy was smiling at him, but that didn't deter Layfette. He was more than used to rolling with the eccentric boy's antics.

"Of course it is! You aren't meant to stay locked up in this house all day, mon ami, come, let's go get our shoes." Layfette was off like a shot, practically hurtling himself up the stairs to get his coat and wallet. Alex followed a slower pace, slipping into his room quietly, and grabbing a beaten up sweatshirt. Not fancy but it was functional. Alex had learned to count the small blessings and a jacket that wasn't ripped to shreds was one. 

"I was thinking that we could go grab coffee with some friends of mine." Layfette's voice made him jump. The other boy was leaning against the door frame, head tilted and face frowned in concern. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, you just... startled me." Alex looked down as he put on his shoes. "That's all." 

It was clear that the Washington's were trying hard to make Alex feel safe here. They didn't touch him without permission, always announced their presence before entering his room, and didn't force him to talk when he was getting overwhelmed. They gave him some safe and always told him that he could talk to them at any time about any subject or problem. Alex hadn't taken up that offer yet, revealing weaknesses or problems was a guaranteed way to setting yourself up for failure, so he tried to play off his fears. 

"Apologies. It was not my intention to scare you." Layfette looked sorry. Alex shrugged and finished tying his shoes. 

"So, we're meeting people for coffee?" Alex asked timidly as they descended down the stairs. Layfette nodded. 

"Yes, just two friends, John and Hercules. They have been asking to meet you, formally and all, and I think this will be a good thing for you. Getting you out of the house, exploring the city, and meeting new people." In theory it sounded nice. Alex hadn't actually explored any of the area of the places he used to live. Not for lack of trying he just never stayed in one place long enough. There was also the fear that if he left for too long then horrible things would happen. Most times, he was more afraid of the outside threats than the ones inside the house. "You can say no, Alex, we don't have to do this if you are not ready." 

"No, it's fine, I just don't think I would be good company." He picked at the nail bed of one of his fingers. "I don't want to embarrass you." It was hard to be someone else, trying to figure out where you went wrong with them, and still trying to live up to their expectations. Alex, having done this countless times, was tired. He didn't want to act anymore, he just wanted to...exist. 

"They'll love you. You are great fun to be around and you won't embarrass me. If anything, I'll do enough embarrassing for the both of us on my own." Layfette stopped him when they got to the bottom of the stairs. He used one finger to tilt Alex's chin up. "I think it would be good to be around people who simply want to get to know you. No strings attached." 

Layfette had started doing that a lot. Claiming that he was only offering things or giving praises because he wanted to, that Alex should have them, not because he was trying to use it to get something else. Alex was a mess when receiving a compliment, sometimes for pointing out a piece of Layfette's outfit or for help Martha around the house. He shrugged it off the first few times then he started to nod and acknowledge them as time went on. As always, the Washington's were patient and didn't push for anything he couldn't give. 

Sometimes, Alex felt like he couldn't give a lot of things. 

"That would be nice." Alex whispered. Layfette grinned and popped his head into the living room, where Marth was curled up on the couch, to let her know. Apparently the coffee shop was just a few blocks down from the house as well as several town shops, should they choose to spend additional time downtown. Martha smiled when she saw that Alex was going and told them both to have fun, to be safe, and call if they needed anything. Layfette gave her a kiss, Alex did a small wave, and then he was being hustled out the door. It was nice out, a light breeze and clear skies, and Alex fell into step with Layfette as they made their way down the sidewalk. 

"Hercules might be a bit loud." Layfette explained. "I mentioned to him that he needs to keep his shouting down to a minimum, he might forget, but don't worry. He's a giant teddy bear and wouldn't hurt a fly." Layfette checked the street before nodding and slowly guided Alex to walk with him across the road. "John is nice as well. He's a little bit shy but I think you'll like talking to him. He's quiet like you. John has a bit of anxiety that's why we're meeting at the coffee shop. It's not a popular one so not many people go there." Alex nodded and tried to calm his stomach from rolling. He had never been invited to meet people that actually wanted to meet him. It was strange, and a bit unsettling, but Alex figured that since he had already agreed to go that he had to go through with it. They saw a few runners on their travels, as well as one dog walker, and Alex longed to pet it but didn't want to hold up Layfette. 

He briefly entertained the idea that the Washington's would allow a pet. Perhaps he could get a dog, not a big one, just a hound that was big enough to cuddle with. Maybe a cat if a dog was too high maintance. Shaking his head, Alex let that idea go. He wouldn't be here long enough for a pet. Sure he would be here for a few more months (about 5 actually) but moving around with an animal was a risk. Having been throw away numerous times, Alex wasn't about to put an innocent animal through that pain. 

"Mon ami, are you alright?" Layfette's voice cut through. Alex jumped and felt his face pale a bit. "Where did you go, huh?" 

"Sorry, I must have spaced out." Alex mumbled. He was doing that a lot recently. Focusing was becoming harder and more than once one of the Washington's would have to call his name several times to get him back and aware to the situation. "What were you saying?" 

"I was saying that we are almost at the shop. I know that you didn't eat much at lunch, so I can get you a snack if you would like, or perhaps a hot beverage? They have decent coffee but their hot chocolate is, how you say, out of this world. Martha gave me some money so you don't have to worry about paying." Alex nodded again. 

They rounded a corner and came up on the shop. It was small, but quiant, and Alex liked it instantly. There were tables in front and the little patio area looked relaxing. There didn't seem to be many people inside, which soothed some of his nerves, but he was worried about meeting Layfette's friends. What if he screwed it up? Or they just didn't like him? Layfette said that they were nice... and suddenly all those reoccuring doubts came back into his mind. He fiddled with a loose string on his sweatshirt. Layfette walked up to the door and opened it. The bell hanging off the frame jingled. 

Some soft jazz music was playing in the background and the whole room smelt wonderful. They hadn't taken more than a couple of steps into the building before a voice called out.

"Layfette! Over here!" Alex turned to see two other boys, one signficantly larger than the other, and his stomach rolled again. Trembling with anxiety, Alex followed Layfette over to their table.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I'm back! Enjoy folks :)


	8. Right Hand Man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> John meets Alex and instantly becomes attached.

John had no idea how this meet-up was going to go. All of them had been begging Lafayette to let them meet Alex, really that's all they could ask once it had become apparent that the Washington's would be taking in another kid, and each day they had remained hopeful that this would be their chance to become friends. However, it was clear that Alex's transition wasn't going smoothly. Lafayette did not give out many details, probably out of respect for Alex, but he could tell that there were some past scars that Alex was working there. There had been that text message about the panic attack, and then it was announced that their shopping trip was being pushed back until Alex was more comfortable. Clearly there was a link there but John couldn't see it. Hercules was beside him, fiddling with his phone, and slouched in his seat which was uncommon for him. 

"Why are you sitting like that? Your back is going to be sore." John pointed out. Hercules looked up from his screen. 

"Laf said that Alex is kinda skiddish around big guys. If I look small here it might make him less scared." And lord was this boy a softie. Alex had no clue that most of them were wrapped around his finger and they hadn't even met face to face. 

"Maybe we shouldn't have pushed so hard to meet him. Laf did say that Alex isn't all that comfortable around new people yet." Sometimes John wondered if they should have pushed Lafayette harder into telling them more about Alex. All they had gotten was that the kid was 14, had originally lived in New York, and now he was here and the Washington's were pushing for a more permanent placement. Aaron had asked if Alex was going to be adopted, and while Lafayette had said his folks were more than open to the idea, Alex was clearly not ready and seemed to be unsure about his place. It was heartbreaking and john couldn't imagine living like that, not knowing where you would end up or who you would live with. 

"I think this is just what he needs. Not the whole group, and not in a crazy setting like the mall. Laf probably sees us as the calmest, with the exception of Aaron, but you know he's in charge of wrangling the others." The door to the coffee shop opened and both of them instantly perked up. Laf was there, dressed in his usual over the top outfit. The boy who was half hidden behind him had to be Alex. God, he was even tinier than Lafayette had described. He couldn't have been any taller than 5'3. And he was skinny. Not the high metabolism skinny, the kind of sickly skinny that you would see in the hospital. Hercules raised his arm and waved them over. Lafayette nudged Alex and the two made their way over to the table. John knew it wasn't polite to stare, and he tried not to, but his eyes roamed over Alex in order to take in every detail. 

It was his hair that caught his eye first. The long locks, which curled at the end, were pulled back into a messy bun. Then it was his eyes. Rich brown, the kind that just pulled you in. Which alerted him to the dark, purplish bags under those beautiful eyes. John didn't think it was wrong to assume that Alex was suffering from nightmares as well. He could only hope that Alex was managing to find some time to sleep. Alex looked pale and his face was gaunt, as if he hadn't been eating right, and parts of his lips were cracked, as if he had been biting down on them. "About time you guys showed up. I'll put in our orders. Your usual, Laf?" Hercules asked as he stood. Alex moved farther behind Lafayette as Hercules moved out of his chair. 

"Yes, that is fine." Laf turned his head around to speak to Alex. "Mon petit lion, what would you like?" For a moment John wasn't sure that Alex was going to answer. Then, in a voice that all of them had to strain to hear, "Can I get a coffee? Just a small one?" And ya, John was gone. There was an accent there, soft and light, and John wanted to hear more. "Of course, Alex! Anything to eat? Something small for you to pick at?" It seemed that Alex was done answering, just pressed against Laf's back, and the french speaking teen turned to Hercules. "Just get my normal order and a small black coffee and a danish for Alex." Hercules saluted and walked over to the counter. 

"I can give you money for it." Alex whispered. John frowned, opening his mouth to tell Alex that it was fine, but Laf beat him to it. 

"Alex, we talked about this, remember? Martha gave us money for today. Besides, this is a treat for you, you don't have to pay anything." From the way Lafayette talked it sounded like an old argument. The older boy nudged Alex over to the chairs, pulling out the one next to John and across from Hercules. "Hello John, nice to see you again. This is Alex, my new brother." Lafayette smiled as he said this. John couldn't help but smile back. 

"Hello Alex, I'm John, it's nice to finally meet you." John said gently. Alex looked up, briefly, and nodded. Again, John had to listen cloesly in order to hear the soft, "Nice to meet you, too." Several minutes later Hercules came back and they did introductions again. Hercules, alreadly sensing that his size was intimidating for Alex, didn't raise his voice and let Lafayette give Alex his drink and snack. Alex didn't talk this time, just nodded, and pressed into Lafayette's side. 

"So, how are you liking Virigina, Alex? Must be a change from New York." John tried. Alex was clutching his cup, staring hard at the table, and he took a small sip before glancing at John. 

"It's nice. Quieter than the city." Alex told him after a moment. Laf was grinning, beaming really, and Hercules was staring gently at the three of them. 

"I never liked the city." Hercules continued. Alex looked up at him, curious, but didn't prod further. "It was loud and the crowds were annoying." Alex took another sip. 

"I didn't like the crowds either." He agreed. Hercules smiled. The rest of the afternoon passed like that. One of them would ask a question or make a statment and Alex, after several moments, would either agree, offer a comment, or nod. Lafayette was obviously enjoying this, and didn't push Alex when it was becoming clear that the younger boy was reaching his limit. John didn't blame him; this coffee shop wasn't the most popular place in town, but it was beginning to get crowded. John took a few deep breaths to allievate some of the anxiety and readily agreed when Hercules suggested that they take a walk around the block. Hercules took their trash and John caught Lafayette praising Alex for eating half of his danish. The boy ducked his head and that pulled on John's heart to see something like that. It was like Alex wasn't used to getting compliments. Outside was cool and the group window shopped for another hour before deciding that it was time to head home. Hercules said good bye to Alex and was rewarded with a soft farwell. John could tell he wanted to jump in success, but he held back. No need to lose the progress he had just made. John waved goodbye and Alex said bye as well, and then Laf did his usual long goodbye despite the fact that they would be texting the moment all of them got home. 

It was in his room later that night that John finally gave in and texted Lafayette. 

To: Lafayette

-You didn't mention that he was so freaking adorable. Honestly, Laf, I felt like I was going to die from cuteness.

From: Lafayette

-He is quite cute. Don't tell him that (not yet). He wouldn't believe you.

To: Lafayette

-What do you mean? 

From: Lafayette

-I mean that Alex has the self-esteem of a doorknob. He's shy and doesn't take anything that someone says to him with any value. We're working on it.

-And by not yet, don't try to make any moves based on his appeal. Mon Alex is...cautious. He's been hurt in the past.

To: Lafayette

-So someone did hurt him. And I won't make a move on him. You know I'm not that kind of person Laf. 

From: Lafayette

-Yes someone did hurt him. Again, we are working on it. Dad is angry but every time he asks Alex about it he shuts down. 

To: Lafayette 

-It makes sense now why you wanted to go kill people earlier. He seems like a nice guy.

From: Lafayette

-He is. Once we got home he seemed to get more curious about you two. I think he'd be open to meeting again. 

-And Alex mentioned that he likes your voice. It's soothing to him for some reason. 

John was suprised for a moment. He didn't think that he had that much of an effect on Alex. After all, the boy didn't really speak up much, or even look them in the eyes, but John knew that Lafayette wouldn't give up that kind of infortmation if it wasn't true. 

To: Lafayette

-I'd like that. I'm not sure how I helped but I'm glad I did. 

From: Lafayette

\- :) 

They texted back and forth, talking about Alex, school, and anything else. Lafayette mentioned that Alex would probably start with them after the break was done. He wouldn't be in their grade, but Eliza would be, and the majority of them were a year or two ahead. Ideally, John wondered how Alex would like their group of friends. Most of them had some loud personailities, Thomas's came to mind first, but for the most part he could easily be controlled. So long as you were firm with him. Before John knew it, the clock read that it was close to midnight and he bid goodnight to Lafayette, telling him to say sleep well to Alex, and started to get ready for bed. He brushed his teeth and washed his face on autopilot. He couldn't stop thinking about Alex, how shy he was, and all the other unasnwered questions surrounding the boy. Why he was in Virginia and not New York, why he was careful and quiet around them, why someone would want to hurt him enough to make him distrust anyone who was even remotely kind to him. 

Crawling into bed and placing his phone on the charger, John rolled over and stared at the ceiling. He closed his eyes and fell asleep thinking about Alex's eyes and the different colors in them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clinical rotation ends this week, I'm signing my new apartment lease, helping a friend move, and still have a list of things to get done. Hope everyone is having a good week!


	9. A Winter's Ball

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> George gets some background information. 
> 
> Warning for some sensitive topics.

George trying not to yell into the depths of the office. It was late, later than Martha liked him to stay up, but when he mentioned that it was about Alex she had let it go. While it had been over a month since Alex had arrived, and since the state had given them permission to keep him long turn, they had gotten very little information about Alex's history prior to coming to live here. Any attempt to find out had been met with resistance, which was expected, but Alex seemed downright scared at points. George was a seasoned man, well-versed in reading between the lines, and he knew that Alex had some dark secrets in his past. George wasn't sure if those were secrets came solely from New York but he knew that he had to find out. Alex's nightmares left him in a dazed state and he would whimper and cry out, always in Spanish, and none of it sounded good. George knew some words but the ones that came up frequently were no, stop, and please. I'm sorry was there often as well. Those nights always left George's heart hurting. 

He called in a favor from a friend that worked in the Foster Agency in New York. Through some miracle she had gotten Alex's file for him, which was much more revealing that the one that had been given to him when Alex first arrived. Information had certainly been omitted, either intentionally or by accident George wasn't sure, and what he read left him reeling. Sometimes George worried that he was doing the wrong thing. That he was trying too hard, trying to achieve the impossible, and that it wasn't going to be enough. The need to understand his newest son, even if nothing was official yet, was pressing down on him. Groaning quietly, George sat up in his chair, rubbing his eyes, and focusing on the electronic file on the computer screen. It was extensive, going back about seven years, and once again, George felt sick to his stomach when he began to look over Alex's past. At least he could cry in the privacy of his office. Martha didn't need this on her conscious. 

Alex was originally from Puerto Rico and he lived with his mother on the island. There was no mention of a father being in the picture and he was unlisted on all the forms. Alex had no siblings. His mother was marked as deceased, succumbing to the flu without access to medical help, so Alex was sent to live with a cousin. That didn't last long; the cousin committed suicide within a month of Alex coming into his care. George frowned as he tried to find out where Alex went after that but nothing came up. George jotted down the question on a pad (missing time after cousin's death, residence unknown) and kept going. The clock read 2:48 am. At least he didn't have work in the morning, he could take the boys out for breakfast, maybe convince them to go see a film or something. George's mood didn't improve when he scrolled down. The island was devastated by a hurricane, and George could vaguely remember it being on the news, and many children were sent to the States to go into the system. 

Alex was nine years old when he was placed at his first foster care home. It wasn't a long stay, a few weeks, before he was moved to another one. From there he kept going from house to house, with only one standing out to George as being a good fit. The lady was older, no husband or children, but she passed away within a few months of taking Alex in. Then he came to the Johnson's. George knew that Alex had experienced abuse in his past. How severe was still to be determined. The couple had no children of their own but had fostered several children prior to Alex. The police had made multiple visits to the home, cited on domestic abuse, and it wasn't long before Alex began to show signs of being harmed. One teacher was listed as reporting what she described visible proof of child abuse. Alex came to class with bruises, he was losing weight at a suspicious rate, and then he stopped coming to school. The Johnson's claimed he was a sickly child. It all ended with Mr. Johnson coming home drunk and attempting to beat Alex while drunk. 

After being removed, after Alex was picked up from a location away from the home, he was placed in a group home. There were accounts of some of the workers trying to molest the children. There was a mention that Alex had lashed out when one of the workers tried to corner him into a broom closet. That was the final straw. Saving everything and closing down the computer, George turned in for the night, quietly walking to the master bedroom, and slipped in. Martha looked up from the bed, reading glasses perched on her nose, book in hand illuminated by the bedside light. 

"You look like you've had an eventful night." She finally said, placing the book aside, and gave her husband her full attention. 

"It feels like it." George walked over to the closet and pulled out some sweatpants and a plain shirt. "I got the file from Diana. I...I couldn't finish it." George leaned against the wall. "I'm calling up the pediatrician tomorrow, we need to get a referral for a psychologist for Alex, I won't let him be in pain anymore." 

"Pain? George, please, what did you find out?" Martha begged. There was a haunted look to her husband and she feared for her youngest. The urge to check on her children was overwhelming but she calmed down; nothing would harm Lafayette or Alex here. 

"Alex was from Puerto Rico, his family is gone, and the families he was placed with were awful. Vile, sick people, how they would ever treat a child like that is unimaginable, and those group homes..." George trailed off, feeling sick again, and he jumped when Martha grabbed his hand. "We need to start the adoption process. I know that you said that we should take this slow, but I can't, I don't want to lose him, the system can't take him again." There was a desperate tone to his voice, and George was a man that didn't beg. 

"Ok, ok, take a deep breath." Martha coached. "George, tell me why it matters. Why does it matter that Alex needs to stay with us." 

"Alex has lost everything, the people that were suppose to take care of him didn't, and the poor kid is so terrified that even giving him a compliment sends him into a panic! Laf loves him, you love him, and I love him. That kid is our son and now I want to make damn sure that nothing comes to take him away from us!" George shouted. Martha reached up to brush the tears off his cheeks. 

"Hey, Alex is ok. He's sleeping down the hall and nothing is going to touch him. Laf popped his head in on him a few hours ago." Martha took a deep breath. "I love Alex just as much as you do. And yes, Laf adores him. But we need to at least talk to Alex about this first. That boy deserves that much. So, yes, if Alex is agreeable to being adopted, then yes, I will gladly go through the process again." She lifted a finger under George's chin and waited until he met her eyes. "I'll call Maria in the morning, just to give her a heads up. Now, why don't we go to bed. Tomorrow is supposed to be a nice day out, we can do something with the boys, and then talk with Alex. How does that sound?" 

"I'd really like that. God, Martha, the things I wanted to do to those people that hurt him." George shook his head. "Let's go to the book store tomorrow. Alex's has been reading that same book for weeks now, he needs some new ones." Martha chuckled and pulled him to the bed once he was changed. 

"I hope you're prepared to explain it to him. Alex is going to freak out over the prices." 

"That is was Lafayette is for. He'll keep Alex calm and then distract him while I pay." George chuckled softly. "Works everytime." His face fell again. "I'm serious about the psychologist, Martha. His nightmares are getting worse and so are the panic attacks." They talked for hours, going back and forth, finally agreeing on getting Alex some mental health (they were on opposite ends about medication), and that they would talk to Alex tomorrow about the possible adoption. If he agreed then Maria would be getting a call within the week. 

"Laf is going to lose his mind when we tell him." Martha said. George was tracing random patterns onto her arm. "He's wanted this for so long. And the other boys, oh, we might have to buy a bigger house they might never leave." Martha didn't seem annoyed at that fact; if anything, she was looking forward to it. She loved it when the house was full of energetic teenagers. 

"We need to worry more about the fact that we may need to adopt the whole crew. I know for a fact John and Hercules are going to glue themselves to Alex's side when school starts up. Rumor is Eliza is going to be in his class." Martha rolled her eyes. 

"Already playing matchmaker, dear, please." Martha looked up at him. "Alex seems excited for school. He kept asking about it the other day. I think he's smarter than he appears. Laf mentioned trying to get him into some of the clubs, make him more confident when he's in a group setting." 

George allowed himself to smile. Alex would be alright. While his file was dark and twisted, filled with all sorts of nightmares, he was safe here. George and Martha were ready to go through the gauntlet of adoption again. Lafayette would be thrilled to finally have a little brother. And Alex...Alex would have a home. One that wasn't going to be pulled out from under him. He'd have a family, one that cared and protected him, like they were supposed to. School would be good for him. George knew that there was a smart kid underneath that shy exterior. 

"You're getting tha dreamy look again." Martha commented. George lifted an eyebrow.   
"The one you had on for weeks when Laf's adoption went through. You never wanted to stop looking at him and that piece of paper." 

"He was ours long before we signed the papers." George pointed out. "Just like we know Alex is ours." Martha laughed. 

"He's already got you wrapped around his finger." Martha chuckled. "Now, we really need to get some sleep, or all these plans are going to be pointless in the morning."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Moving into the new apartment tomorrow (my body is already sore) but read and enjoy folks!


	10. Helpless

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Martha and George start to pave the way for another adoption. Alex opens up about his life prior to coming to the states.

Alex wasn't sure what had changed in the house, but something had, and he couldn't figure it out which had him on edge these days. For the past week, George had been going back and forth from his office and the living room, having tons of conversations on the phone, and most of the time Martha was there with him, ushering him and Lafayette out the door or upstairs with some task or a plea for them to go be teenagers. Laf had tried to calm him down, citing that if it was bad they would have known by now, and that it was probably work related or something to do with the charity Martha ran. Alex, after a while, finally accepted those reasons, merely because he didn't have anything else to go off of and wondering all the time was making his head spin. Today, the two of them were out at the local mall. He had caved last week and finally agreed to go clothes shopping. Lafayette, having been waiting for this moment since Alex arrived, jumped at the opportunity and easily found a store that would suit both of their needs; lots of options for Lafayette and low cost and few people for Alex. They managed to get through the pants section easily enough, but hit a small snag when it came to shirts. Alex liked the graphic tees, probably never even worn them before, and Laf had placed at least a dozen in the bin before Alex stopped him. There was a rack of nice dress shirts that Alex had been fingering, looking over, and Laf could see the cogs in his brother's head going a mile a minute. Even though it had been a few months since Alex come to live with them, he was still withdrawn at times, and expressing when he wanted something, not out of practically or need, was still a work in progress. Deciding that Alex wouldn't come right out and say that he liked the shirts, not after the forth time he lingered by the rack, Laf came over.

"These are nice." Alex was holding onto a light blue shirt. The smaller boy nodded and dropped the sleeve. "Do you want to pick out some?" He asked gently. Alex shook his head, no surprise there, and Laf waited until he was looking up before making his observations. "You've been looking at these several times, mon ami, if you like the shirts, why not pick out a few?" Alex bit his lip and looked down again. It was a nervous tic that had shown up after the first panic attack and was always a read flag to show that Alex was becoming overwhelmed. 

"It's the price." Alex said softly. "Each one is almost $20, one shirt costs the same as two of the other shirts, and almost the same as one pair of pants." Laf cursed in his head, he had forgotten that the price tags would still remind Alex how much they were spending. "I'm not worth-" 

"Alex, repeat after me: I am worth more than a $20 shirt." Lafayette said firmly. Alex's head snapped up, and for a moment the French boy saw a bright spark before it disappeared in those eyes, and his shoulders dropped. 

"I'm worth more than a $20 shirt." Alex parroted back after a moment. Laf smiled at him and then laced their hands together. Touch was still a big trigger for Alex. Laf was the one he was most comfortable with, the older boy easily offering and givng out hugs, but Martha and George were still held at arms length. Laf wasn't sure if it was a trust thing or the fact that the majority of Alex's abusers had been adults, but he didn't see it changing anytime soon. In public, Alex was hesitant with physical contact, but holding hands was a sure why to keep him grounded and share comfort. Alex's fingers wrapped around his and gave a small squeeze. 

Laf helped Alex pick out three of the dress shirts (the blue one as well as a dark maroon and forest green) and then called it a day. They payed up front, Laf blocking Alex's view of the price, and then insisted on carrying the bags. Alex didn't speak up until they were waiting on the benches by the door, both watching the cars outside for Martha's silver Honda. 

"My mom loved shirts like that." Laf whipped his head around to stare at his brother. Alex hadn't once mentioned his mother, his birth mother, and George had been hesitant to give him any information, wanting Alex to be the one to share what he wished. "Where we lived on the island, there weren't a lot of shops, but there was this one that always had dress shirts. Sometimes we would go in and look at them, but they costed way more than we ever had, and I never needed one." Laf wanted to say, "well, you could still want a shirt, Alex.", but he didn't Alex still struggled with the concept of getting something based on want and not necessity. "When the storm hit..." Alex squeezed his eyes shut and Laf scooted closer, patiently waiting until Alex came back. "The store was gone and I didn't see any of them till today. I never got to go to any stores when I was in New York." 

"Then I am glad we got some for you today." Laf admitted. "Thank you for sharing that with me." Alex nodded, eyes staring at something that Laf couldn't see, and leaned against him. Less than ten minutes later, Martha pulled up, and Laf steered Alex towards the car, only going to put the bags in the trunk once Alex was seated. The moment he got into the car, in the backseat, Alex's hand shot out and over, lacing his fingers with Lafayette's. Laf's throat got tight and he didn't hesitate to fold his fingers, rubbing his thumb over the back of Alex's hand. The whole drive back home Laf listened with one ear to Martha's talking. His mind was focused on one thought the entire time. 

That was the first time that Alex, not Lafayette, had been the one to initiate physical contact. 

XXX

Maria Reynold's had said that there was a good chance that Alex could be adopted within the next two years. There was no one to contest the adoption, no mother, father MIA and had been for over five years, and no other existing family. The Washington's had a good record, and great standing with the state, as well as an oppomistic relationship with Alex as potential permanent parents. Maria, however, stressed that they needed to talk to Alex about this before they went any further. She reminded them that Alex clearly wanted to know about the status of his stay with the Washington's, but didn't bring up adoption even though he clearly wanted to. 

"You need to understand," Maria said as she leaned back in her chair. "None of his previous families ever expressed interest in adopting him. I know we agreed on six months before deciding on anything else, so if you want to wait until then to bring it up, that is an option." George bounced his leg on the floor; Martha leaned over and put her hand on his knee to stop him. 

"What are the other options?"

"You tell him now. Let Alex know that you both want him to be legally yours, explain that there won't be another foster home after this, and that he would be taken out of the system. I understand that you plan to start him at the local high school in a few weeks, which will help him put down more roots, and he's already bonded with your son." Maria listed. Martha nodded. 

"We plan on taking him to our family doctor soon and we'll get a recomendation for a psychologist as well. We would rather we get the latter done before we tell him, that way he has someone unbiased to talk to." Martha wanted Alex to feel like he had a person to talk to that wasn't them. Alex had scars, lots of scars, and Martha was concerned by the dark circles under her youngest son's eyes and his talent for evading questions and saying a lot of unsaid things. 

"Good. In that case," Maria said as she clicked on the computer. "Get the counselor set up. After that I suggest telling him. Stability is crucial right now, and Alex hasn't had a lot of that, so telling him in a safe environment without a lot fo distractions would be best." George nodded, clearly mapping out his talking points, and then their meeting was over. Maria told them that they would be in touch, which Martha readily seconded, and the maried couple left the building to go home. Laf and Alex had been in the middle of a movie marathon when they had left earlier and if they didn't catch traffic they could make it home in time to join them. 

"Are you getting excited?" George asked as he put the car in drive and pulled out of the parking lot. Martha moved her purse to the floor of the passenger seat. 

"Yes, I just want to tell him, George. Laf clearly wants him to stay and I've caught him almost calling Alex his brother or baby brother about a dozen times already." Martha replied. "I just want to make him ours." 

"Alex Hamilton-Washington." George tried out. Alexander wouldn't be used, Alex didn't respond well to his full name, but George knew that Alex was still comfortable with his last name. "I like the sound of that." Next to him, his wife grinned, and nodded. 

"You're going to go crazy, aren't you?" Martha chuckled. George raised an eyebrow at the statement. 

"What ever do you mean, Mrs. Washington?" 

"I mean, Mr. Washington, that you are going to be a giant protective papa-bear once it's offical." 

"You think I'm not protective now?" George asked, half joking half worried. Martha patted his thigh. 

"Oh, you're protective now, dear, but you're going to be worse when he's legally ours. That poor boy doesn't even know the mountains you'll move for his sake." George smiled and relaxed. He had gone up to the plate for Lafayette. He would do the same for Alex. It wasn't even a question. They rolled into the driveway and both of them hustled into the house. Their boys were in the same spot, Laf stretched out on the couch, Alex curled up under a blanket with Laf's legs on his lap. Laf welcomed them back loudly and Alex offered them a small smile. George knew he had work to do, but he just wanted to spend time with his boys, forgetting the rest of the world for a little bit. 

"Alright, which movie are we on?" George asked as he settled into the arm chair. He grinned as Laf started to catch him up to speed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> School starts soon (which is stressful), applying for jobs is soul sucking (and stressful) but I'm in a new apartment so I'm happy. Read and enjoy guys!


	11. Satisfied

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex has an off day.

Alex wasn't having a good morning. He had been restless all night, unable to find a comfortable position, and when he did finally manage to drift into a sleep like state, he'd woken up from a nightmare. He couldn't recall what it was about, and when he opened his eyes, his heart was pounding and he felt unsafe. Normally he would go across the hall and see Lafayette, but his body didn't move, so he stayed in his room, scared, until he calmed down. His mind threw out the term panic attack, and Alex knew that he should go see someone about it (Martha was trying to get him to establish a feeling of security within the home after an attack), but he held back. It was not the first time, nor the last, that he would have a panic attack. And he didn't talk about what could set it off. The list was endless: sudden touch, loud yelling, being alone with a larger man, having no way out in a room...the reasons went on. Sometimes he wouldn't get set off by it, like when Laf hugged him, and other times he'd freak out at the drop of a hat, like when Martha accidently closed the front door to loudly and sent him running up the stairs to his room. So, a sleepless night had already doomed him to a pretty crappy day. At breakfast, his nerves still wouldn't settle, and he couldn't eat more than a few bites. The coffee remained untouched, a huge red flag, so he sat quietly at the table while the others ate and talked. George sent him a few concerned looks, and every time Alex thought he would say something, or to scold him, it wouldn't come. George would send him a soft smile but Alex could see the concern in his eyes. It still made him feel weird to have that look directed at him, since Alex had been told many times he was worthless. Martha got him to eat a few more bites, and Laf distracted him while he did it, and then had him go lay down on the couch while she and George cleaned up. Lafayette followed him and curled up beside him on the sofa. 

"How are you feeling today, little Alex?" Laf said gently. He arranges them on the couch so that Alex is leaning on the older boy, safely wrapped in his arms, and that is a new development. He still is wary of touch, and with good reason, but with Lafayette he feels safe. Secure. Things that he hasn't had in a long, long time, and certainly not from anyone who mattered. Lafayette is someone who matters to him, and while Alex hasn't told him yet, he thinks the French speaking teen knows already. He's bright like that, and John mentioned that Laf had a good knack for reading people. "Alex." Laf is looking at him with wide eyes, and Alex can see the questions on his lips, but all he does is snuggle in closer and hides his face in the space between Laf's neck and head. "Ok, why don't I find a movie for us to watch, would that be alright?" Alex shrugs and closes his eyes. He doesn't like to make decisions when he's feeling like this, like his stomach is sinking into itself, and it's not like he would be interested in the movie anyway right now. His eyes feel heavy. Being on the couch, warm and protected by his foster brother, Alex could probably sleep for an hour or so. He's been lucky enough to not have recurring nightmares each time he sleeps; someone at the group home did, and she would wake the entire ward up. It got to the point that one of the older kids, a real piece of work boy, found a thing of pills and shoved them down her throat to make her quiet. It solved the screaming problem...and also killed the girl. That was around the time Alex started to sleep less and less, terrified he would be next, and survived solely on small naps taken throughout the day. The dark circles under his eyes were still there. At least the purple smudges weren't as vivid as before. 

"Can I stay here with you?" Alex asked after the opening credits passed by. Laf ran his fingers up and down his arm; Alex didn't like him touching his back or his hair. Too many times he had been shoved or thrown by someone pushing him or grabbing his hair. "I'll be quiet." Laf pressed a feather light kiss to his forehead. Alex sighed and moved in closer. "You don't need to promise to be quiet, Alex, I can stay here with you for as long as you want. Are you warm enough or should I grab a blanket?" Laf asked. Alex was warm enough, still dressed in his black sweatpants and long sleeve shirt, and shook his head. He was comfy and sleepy and safe. Alex didn't fall into a deep sleep, and he was aware that Martha and George popped in occasionally. Sometimes they would ask Laf something. Alex focused on the rumbling of his voice as he spoke. No one tried to separate them, which is what happened when Alex first came to the states, torn away from kids just like him. Not that Lafayette would let them do that. He was fierce, as he and his friends claimed, and had said many times that Alex was his brother now. "You can sleep Alex, it's alright, I'll keep you safe." Alex opened his eyes, noting that someone had closed the curtains to block out the sun, and the movie's sound had been turned down low. He scanned the room. "George had to go to work. Martha is upstairs in the office. Why don't you sleep and when the movie is done, I'll make you something light to eat and we can decide what to do next, ok?" Alex nodded and closed his eyes. 

Eating was still a big issue. Alex was not used to having three square meals a day, not even the small snacks that Martha provided for him, so many times he either refused a meal or only picked at his food. It drove George crazy and it made Martha worry. Laf was the one that had made the most progress with having him eat more; often, he distracted him with a funny story or the latest trend in fashion or pointless celebrity gossip. His ribs were still prominent, however, and Martha had made a mention earlier this week that they had an appointment for the pedatrician on friday. Alex wasn't thrilled with that, not with strangers touching him or being around doctors, but he held his tongue. No sense getting into an arguement over something that would happen whether he liked it or not. At least George said that Lafayette could do with him and that the doctor was a female. That reassured him a small bit. Alex was sure that Laf let him sleep longer than the length of the movie. When he opened his eyes again, the movie was at the beginning scenes and Laf was alternating running his hand up and down his arm and texting someone on his phone. Alex didn't try to see the name, shifting in the loose hold so he could sit up. Laf let him go, remaining on his back, and grinned at him. 

"You were supposed to wake me up." Alex chided. Laf smirked at him. "You told me to wake you up when the movie was done. You never mentioned how many times the movie had to be played." Alex let a small smile grace his face when he realized he had been outsmarted. Laf was always doing that, finding loopholes in the things Alex said, so he could sleep longer, or eat a few more bites. It wasn't mean or harmful, just Laf's brand of caring, and he cared a whole lot for Alex. "Are you hungry, mon ami?" Laf asked. When Alex didn't answer his face turned a bit more serious. "Alex, you need to eat something. How about a peanut butter sandwich? Does that sound alright?" It was better than the pancakes and Laf knew not to lather the peanut butter on too thick. Alex nodded and was ushered into the bright kitchen. He looked at the coffee pot longingly. Laf narrowed his eyes. "No, no coffee until you've eaten. Do we have a deal?" Alex nodded. If Laf was put off by his nonverbal answers he didn't let it show. Laf moved flawlessly around the kitchen and stayed with Alex as he nibbled on his sandwich. 

"Would you want to have a movie night sometime this week?" Laf asks. His holding his phone and Alex can only assume that he's been texting one of his friends. Alex has only met John and Hercules, but he knows that there are others. According to Martha, Laf is a social butterfly. He wonders if she wants him to become one too, talking to one person after another, and the thought of that makes his head spin. He doesn't mind people, well, some people, but he generally tends to keep to himself. It's safer that way. John seems nice, in a quiet calm way, and Hercules really is a giant teddy bear once you get past his size. "Can John and Hercules come?" Alex whispers. He's not used to asking for things. There is always a cost, some price to pay, and he still vividly remembers his freak out when the Washington's wanted to take him shopping when he first arrived. 

"Of course. How do you feel about meeting some new faces?" Laf says. Alex shrugs. "Angelica and Eliza wish to come over as well. They are both extremely nice, Alex, they wouldn't dream of harming you." Alex looks up and offers a small smile. "You wouldn't let them hurt me anyway." That makes Laf perk up. Alex relaxes into his seat, glad that he put that look on Laf's face, and fiddles with the crusts on his plate. "No, Alex, I wouldn't let them harm you. So that sounds alright for you, a movie night with John, Hercules, Angelica, Eliza, and myself?" Alex nods, even though the small list of people makes him anxious. Laf tells him that if it gets too much he can go upstairs to his room to calm down and no one would judge him for it. 

Laf texted the girls to let them know it was alright to come over. He showed Alex the text messages from John (which included lots of exclaimation marks) and Hercules (way too many emojis). The two of them went for a walk around the block, since Alex was getting fidgity but not willing to go too far from the house, and greeted Martha in the living room when they came back inside. She was thrilled with the movie night idea and reminded Laf were the extra cots and sleeping bags were in case anyone wanted to sleep over. 

When Alex crawled into bed that night, he wasn't restless. The blankets felt comforting, not restricting, and he fell asleep quickly. There were no nightmares that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's really freaking hot on the East coast right now and school is...well, it's school. Read and enjoy peeps!


	12. The Story of Tonight (Reprise)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex meets some new people. George and Martha try not to eavesdrop.

Alex was trying hard not to panic. Laf was downstairs, helping George bring all the sleeping bags up from the basement, and Alex had elected to stay in his room. He was still dressed in his pajamas, which wasn't a problem since it was Saturday, but Angelica and Eliza would be here soon, and Alex wanted to make a good impression. He needed to appear somewhat normal, even though Laf had told him a dozen times that he didn't need to worry, and Alex tried. He really, really tried. He kept reminding himself that Hercules and John seemed to like him just fine, so there was no reason that his first meeting with the girls wouldn't go the same. From what he had heard, and been told, Angelica was a straightforward girl, driven and blunt. Eliza was sweet, caring, and had a knack for drawing people out of their shells. Alex suspected that that was the reason why they had been invited, out of all of the people that he was informed of, and didn't comment on it. So, he was hiding in his room, panicking. 

Maybe he could fake being sick. It wouldn't be the first time he had stayed in his room for the whole day, his bad days were still often enough to warrent concern, but Alex frowned when he thought about how disappointed Lafayette would be if he didn't come down. He had been so excited to introduce more of his friends. Hercules and John were great, better than great most days, and Laf didn't force him to meet new people. George was worried about how it would affect him when school started up again, since it was just a week away, and Martha echoed his concerns. Alex tried not to let it get to him. School was a tricky subject for him; the classes weren't the problem, the people were. Teachers either pushed him too hard or not enough. Alex got bored easily and then acted out. At least, in the beginning he did. Lately, Alex couldn't seem to use his quick witted tongue, which he could account to recent events. Alex huffed and flopped down onto his bed. A light knock on his door made him jump. 

"Alex, you ready, bud?" George's voice came through the wood. Alex shivered, still afraid that one day George would just bardge in, but it didn't happen. George simply waited outside and when Alex gave no answer, he knocked again. "Alex, I won't rush you, but Laf is almost set and Hercules just pulled in. I jus want to known if you're alright, Alex?" There was a steady tone to the older mans voice and Alex relaxed. George wouldn't hurt him, had given no indication that he had plans to, and Alex had to remind himself that a few times. Finally finding his voice, Alex swallowed, and replied, "Not yet, I'll be done soon. Is that ok?" Alex waited with bated breath for George's answer. "Of course, Alex, take your time. I'll let the boys known you'll be down shortly." Then the heavy steps of George's boots faded away from the door and down the stairs. Tension that Alex hadn't been aware of bled out of his body. Suddenly tired, Alex sighed, and walked over to his dresser. Pulling out a pair of jeans, and a plain shirt, he quickly changed clothes and inched out his room. 

"Ah, there he is!" Hercules cheered as he rounded the corner and entered the living room. Hercules was stretched out on the couch, video game controller in hand, and Laf was yelling at him on the floor. Clearly, whatever game they were playing wasn't going well for his foster brother. "We were beginning to think that you wouldn't come down." Alex shrugged and curled up on the empty loveseat. Hercules didn't seem bothered by his lack of verbal response. "Now, Laf here is going to lose to me," he said as he crossed the finish line, "And I think it's time you learned how to play." He offered up a smile and the controller. Alex glanced at it and off to Lafayette. Laf grinned at him and jumped up and show him all the buttons. Alex was doing his third practice run, Hercules coaching him through a smoother turn, when the doorbell rang. Alex flinched and Laf rubbed his arm to sooth him. 

"Alright, the party is here!" John said as he walked in. He dropped his backpack and pulled out a package of cupcakes from the plastic bag in his other hand. "Gentleman, Alex," he winked there and Alex looked down, face red, and kicked off his shoes. "John Laurens, were you raised in a barn?" Martha asked as she looked him up and down. John gulped and quickly put his shoes away and tidied up his belongings. Laf was shaking with silent laughter. 

"You could have held open the door for us." A new voice said and Alex was treated to the sight of two girls. Angelica and Eliza then. "Honestly, John, you claim to be a gentleman but I don't think you know the first thing about being a polite individual." Alex frowned and gripped the control tighter. 

"John is polite. He just got excited." Alex defened. John preened, pleased that Alex spoke out and even more flattered that he was the focus. The taller girl smirked.

"You must be Alex." She held out a hand. "I'm Angelica. This is my sister, Eliza." Eliza waved her fingers at him. Alex smiled back, hesitant, and eyed Angelica's hand. She didn't seem bothered by the fact that Alex didn't shake it. Martha helped the girls get settled, and then told the group to decide on dinner. There was a bried battle, Laf and John voicing their want for pizza, but it was quickly changed to Chinese when Alex shook his head to ever having it. Eliza sat down next to him, and picked up the discarded controller on the floor. "I think I can beat you. Want to try?" Alex shrugged. Eliza let him pick the first course and then since she won that race, she picked the next one. They all agreed to play each other, and soon the living room was filled with the teens yelling and cheering at one another. George sorted out dinner, well used to feeding a bunch of ravonous teens, and then dimmed the lights when it was time to start the movie marathon. Curled up on the couch, filled with good food, and content with the people around him, Alex watched the movie with heavy eyes. Laf, who had fought his way back to his original position, let him lean against him. Relaxed for the moment, Alex drifted off, not minding that he wouldn't see the end of the movie. 

XXX

Martha knew she shouldn't try to spy on the children. It wasn't right and she wanted them to have a good time. George was doing some paperwork on the counter, a cup of hot tea next to him, and smiled every once in a while. She noticed that he smiled more when they heard Alex talk out more. The party went on well into the night, with George updating parents if needed, and the adults retired upstairs after calls for the teens to behave themselves. Martha went through her normal nightime routine, George keeping pace with her, and then two of them curled up in the bed. 

"I think that this was a good idea. Inviting them over." Martha whispered. George chuckled. 

"It was all Lafayette's idea. He wants to get Alex exposed to as many people as possible before school starts." George said. Martha nodded. "I think school will be good for him." 

XXX

"You're good with him." Angelica said as she helped bring some of the plates into the kitchen. Laf smiled. "I mean it, you can calm him down and I don't think I've seen you smile this much in weeks." 

"He's good," Laf told her. "He's wonderful, and shy, and I want him to know that there are still nice people out there that can care about him without wanting something in return." Angelica could see the loaded statement, and even though she itched to find out why, she held her tongue. There would be a time to get all the details, ones that she was not priviledged too just yet, and Alex was in the other room after all. Laf had warned her that he tended to get anxious easily and preferred it if people just didn't bring attention to his time spent in the foster care system. There had been many late night text messages of Laf freaking out, either because he was worried he would do something to set Alex off or that Alex had suffered through another nightmare or panic attack and didn't tell anyone. 

"I see that," Angelica agreed. "Which is why when school starts up I'll tell Peggy to kick the ass of anyone that messes with him. He's sweet, Laf, and everyone can tell that you love him." She got a wicked smile on her face for the next part. "John seems quite smitten with him." Laf rolled his eyes. 

"Oh, he is very smitten. He blushed so hard when they first met." Laf leaned against the sink. "I want him to be happy. If John makes him happy, then so be it." He tapped his fingers on the metal lip of the sink. "However, that does not exclude him from getting the shovel talk. And a talk from Martha and George." Angelica raised an eyebrow. "They're very protective of him." She knew that the Washington's were clearly over the moon with Alex, and Laf had mentioned that they would be fostering him long term, and looking at the situation now, Angelica knew it was only a matter of time before Alex was offically adopted. 

"I think they would be happt together." Angelica bumped her shoulder against Lafayette's arm. "Well, whatever happens, we'll make sure Alex is looked after. Who knows, school might make him open up more." Laf frowned. 

"Or it could make it worse." 

"Well, someone is acting like a concerned big brother." She got a flick on the nose for that. "I mean it, Laf, I think it'll be fine. We just need to find the right balance." 

"He still has to meet the rest of the group."

"Aaron is a cake walk. And I have a feeling Jefferson will be an asset in this case; you know how much he loves a challenge." The two of the finished up and returned to the living room. Alex was asleep on the couch, and curled up once more when Laf returned to his spot. The movie was on low, since Hercules and Eliza were also asleep. John was trying to keep his eyes open, and it didn't fall to escape Angelica's notice that he would always glance back to Alex. Or that his hand was lightly curled up around his ankle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of things are due and I haven't finished them yet (looking at you Master's thesis draft due Monday...) but here's a new chapter instead! Read and review!


	13. Wait For It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Washington's tell Alex about their plans. It goes...well, about how you expect it would.

They had talked about it dozens of times. As a couple, thinking on their own, and with Alex's case worker, Maria. She seemed confident that the process would go smoothly, there was no one to come and contest the proposed adoption, and the Washington's had a good record. With one foster case turned adoption, it looked favorable, at least according to Maria. She gave them an estimate of about one year, two at the most, and stressed the point that Alex needed to be told sooner than later. Martha, nodding seriously, reached across her chair and grabbed George's hand. "We've been meaning to tell him, we just haven't found the right time, you know? He's just so skittish when you try to talk to him about it." Maria gave a sad smile at that. "Just the other day, Lafayette, he invited some of his other friends over. He wanted to introduce Alex to more of his friends, get him to socialize more, and it worked. He fell asleep on the couch, surrounded by people, he never does that Maria. He's starting to trust us more."

"It's not uncommon for children who have been in the system for a long time to have trust issues. The fact that he's open up to you as much as he has, even going as far as making friends with you son, those are good signs." Maria said. She gave them a small smile, one that spoke on how many times she had done this. "However, I can not stress enough on having a conversation, or multiple conversations, with Alex. He needs to understand what is happening and all of you need to be aware of what the process entails. Adoption is wonderful, Mister and Misses Washington, I don't need to tell you that, but each one is different. Alex has trauma in his history and I don't advise waiting to tell him about your decision." George squeezed his wife's hand. They had been thinking about this for weeks, ever since Alex's first few days with them. "Now, with that said, I believe I have all the necessary paperwork to get the ball rolling. I assume you'll be heading home to let Alex know?" 

George chuckled. "Yes, you're right, Maria, we'll be telling Alex soon." At Maria's, and Martha's, unimpressed look George quickly corrected himself. "Actually, tonight sounds like a good time. Yes, we will be telling Alex tonight." Goodbyes were said and the pair was off to their car to start the journey home. "How do you think he's going to take it? Good? I think he'll be receptive to it. Maybe we should warn Laf ahead of time, so that if Alex does freak out, which he won't, it won't be so bad." George said as he slipped into the drivers seat. "Or, maybe we should just come right out and say it. That we've been thinking about keeping him since we were introduced. That we're over the moon crazy about him and want him to be in our lives forever." Martha laughed in her seat, shaking her head, knowing that George tended to ramble when he was nervous. 

When they walked into the house there was noise coming from the kitchen. Lafayette was at the stove, guiding Alex it seemed, and whatever they were making smelled wonderful. "Now, when it's golden brown like this, then you take it out. Everyone needs to know how to make a grilled cheese in their life, mon ami." Ah, so Laf had given into cooking and dragged Alex along for the ride. In the beginning, Laf had spent lots of his time in the kitchen, cooking and baking, sometimes in the mornings and other times in the middle of the night. George and Martha couldn't count the amount of times they had been woken up by the sound of pots clanging together only to come downstairs and sit through the night with him. The food was delicious anyway, so it was worth it. 

"And that's it? That's all you have to do to make one?" Alex asked. Laf laughed, making the two of them smile in the doorway, and pulled out a plate. "Yes, that's how simple it is. You've never had one of these before, correct?" Alex shrugged. "I wanted to, but never got the chance. Many of the homes didn't give you free reign over the kitchen and whatever was placed in front of you at meal times you ate without complaint. Grilled cheese was never one of them." Martha leaned against George as Lafayette cut the grilled cheese into two parts. He handed one to Alex and then tapped the pieces of bread together. Alex made a happy noise when he bit into it and Laf joined in. "See, it's good isn't it?" 

"I hope you two won't mind making us a couple of those?" Martha joked. Both boys jumped, Alex nearly dropping his sandwich, but he didn't startled as badly as usual. "This how you been keeping busy?" Alex shrugged. "We couldn't find a movie to watch and it's been raining all day." Stormy weather was something that made Alex uncomfortable and he tended to retreat into himself during those times. Lafayette went to the fridge and pulled out the bread, butter, and cheese. George sat down on the kitchen stool and draped his coat on the counter. "Lafayette wanted to show me how to make a grilled cheese since I never had one before." He looked shyly over at the other boy who was in front of the stove again. "He's a good teacher."

"Lafayette used to cook all the time. From the minute he arrived. I think my waist size went up the first year he lived with us!" Martha joked. Lafayette playfully poked her with the blunt end of the butter knife and went back to focusing on the skillet. "Now, since all of us are together, we did have something that we wanted to talk to you both about." Alex stiffened up and George sent him a reassuring smile. "We've been talking to Maria, Alex, and we were wondering about your thoughts on becoming a more permanent part of this family." It was clear that the words didn't register for a moment, so Martha took a breath and went for it. "Alex, we want to adopt you, dear. That's why we've been having so many meetings with your case worker." 

Lafayette had stopped what he was doing at this point. Alex was standing still, almost not breathing, and then he shook his head. "Alex, mon ami, this is a good thing, yes?" He went to touch him and Alex stepped back. The three of them didn't say anything, letting the news soak in, and Alex stared at some spot on the floor, food forgotten on the counter. Lafayette gave them their grilled cheeses and then went to stand by him, close enough to comfort him, but not actually touching. Alex, for all intent and purposes, seemed to have shut down. "Mon petit lion, do you understand what they're telling you? You can stay with us, with me, forever if you want. This is a good thing to hear, yes?" 

"You want to adopt me?" Alex said after a few moments. His face was dazed, almost confused, and Martha wanted to wrap him up her arms and never let go. "Why? Why do you want to keep me? No one else ever has?" George leaned foward and spoke calmly. "We know you're a bright kid, Alex, and you've got a good heart. I know you haven't had the easiest time before coming here, but we all love you, and can't even imagine having to let you go. It already feels like you've been here forever, Alex, as if you have been a part of our family. That's why we want to adopt you, we can't bear the thought of you walking out that door and never coming back to us." 

"How long have you been talking to Maria about this?" Alex asked as he raised his eyes to meet their gaze. Martha didn't hesitate to answer. "We've been thinking about it for a few weeks and only just started to talk to Maria about it. She was adament that we tell you and get your opinion on it before moving forward." Alex nodded and pushed away from the counter and left the kitchen. Several moments later they heard the sound of his bedroom door closing and the click that meant that Alex had locked it behind him. Lafayette quickly followed upstairs. Judging from the lack of noise, he had most likely decided to camp out in front of Alex's door. George buried his face in his hands. "Well, that could have gone better." 

"He knows now." Martha argued, her voice faint. She had expected a reaction from Alex, but the lack of response was concerning. It was as if nothing sunk in after they had told him of their intentions. "Does he think that this is another trick? Did one of his past homes tell him they wanted to adopt him only to back out?" Martha asked. She and George had gone through Alex's file with a fine tooth comb, once George allowed her to read it, but there had been inconsitencies before, as well as missing information. Martha was sure that if she was right, and someone had tried to trick Alex with adoption before, she might just go up to New York and do horrible, horrible things. 

"Why don't we give him some space, coming back to it in a few hours. Laf's up there with him now and if he needs anything he'll handle it. As much as we want to be there right now, Alex isn't going to let us know what he's thinking yet." George pushed his plate away, hunger gone, and sighed. "We told him some big news, dear, and Alex has already had some big changes this year. We'll give him some time to think about, come to terms with it, before trying again." That was easier said than done. The two of them were restless, itching to go upstairs, and hoping to hear anything. But Lafayette didn't call for them and Alex didn't open his door. 

As the day passed by, with both adults getting worried, Lafayette finally came downstairs. Martha jumped up from her position on the couch. "He's gonna stay there for the rest of the night. I don't think he's mad, but he sounded...upset, I think." Her son shrugged his shoulders. "I think he's overwhelmed, Mom, of all the things he was expecting to hear, this wasn't one of them." George sent him off to bed a few hours later, tapping on Alex's door to let him known that if he needed anything he could tell any of them, and then ushered his wife off as well. They tossed and turned, staring at the ceiling, wondering if they had done the right thing. Alex didn't come to them in the night and Lafayette resumed his vigil when he woke up that morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Grad school is going and work is going well. So, read and review!


	14. Stay Alive

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex has some time to think.

Alex knew from past experience that he didn't have the best time when he locked himself away. He checked the lock on the bedroom door, confident that it would hold, and then crawled under his bed with his back to the wall. Here, no one could grab him and he would see and hear them long before they noticed him. Not seen and not heard had become one of his personal mottos as he lived with the worse homes. So, here he was, hiding away, trying to shut off anything around him. His hands were shaking, no doubt from the revelation downstairs, and Alex bit his lips to keep back the tears. The pattern of these homes had always been the same. He would arrive, do something to piss them off, and then he'd be removed and passed along to the next person. No one had ever wanted to keep him longer than they had to. If anything, the Washington's were looking for ways to get him to stay longer. Tonight had clearly been the crux of it, George and Martha telling him of their plans, and then he was left with the decision. 

Which, now that he thought about it, was a horrible idea. He could say yes, and get adopted, and then that was it. He'd be here, forever, living with the Washington's and with Lafayette as his brother. He'd get to see John more often. He could go to sleep in his bed every night and not worry about what horrors would come at him as his eyes were closed. But, if he said no, or that he wasn't ready... Alex wasn't sure how they were react. Hell, adoption hadn't even been discussed once since he arrived here. Maybe he was deemed to damaged, he would have thought so in the beginning, but now he suspected it was something else. And until he figured it out, Alex didn't want to give an answer. So, he remained curled up under his bed until he jumped when someone knocked on the door. "Alex, mon petit lion, are you awake?" Lafayette's voice filtered through the door and Alex wanted to answer him, but as he opened his mouth, the words got caught in his throat. Lafayette knocked again. 

"Alex? I understand that you might not want to talk to anyone right now, and that is alright, but I need you to open the door. I have breakfast with me and you need to eat something." The concern for him was always there. It had been present since he arrived, shaking and fearful of anything and anyone, and it hadn't left. Not even after last night when Alex basically walked out on them after they had offered him his dream on a gold plate. For the first time since being sent to the States, Alex felt safe. Safe and in a someone whole fashion. He'd been fed, clothed, and never once got hit. Sure, he got more hugs and gentle touches then he knew what to do with, but if that was all he had to deal with then he could handle it. He had grown to enjoy his quiet mornings with George, the car drives with Martha, and hanging out with Lafayette. These were things he never thought he would have after loosing his mom or after the hurricane or after the abuse suffered at the many, many former foster homes. 

"I'm up, just give me a second." Alex said. His voice must have been loud enough because Lafayette didn't knock again. It took a moment to get out from under the bed. When he opened the door, Lafayette was holding two plates. He brushed by Alex, setting the plates down on the bed, and then swooped in to hug him. Alex always felt his safest here. Lafayette tucked his head under his chin, warm arms braced him, and all Alex had to do was relax. "I'm sorry I worried you." He was getting better at hearing the unspoken words that his foster brother didn't say. Potentially no longer his foster brother. That was a sobering thought, and one that sent excitement through him, because he never had a sibling before and he didn't want to give up the closest one he ever had. "You needed time to process everything, Alex, don't ever apologize for that." Lafayette was calm, as usual, and didn't accept any of his normal apologies. He always said that Alex said sorry more than any other word.

"I know, but they just came out and said it, and I didn't know how to act!" Alex said as he broke out of the hug. Lafayette let him go and picked up one of the plates. It had pancakes, one of his favorites, and he didn't need to taste it to know that Martha had made it with cranberries since he liked those better than blueberries. The two of them ate in silence for a time, Alex trying to find the words he wanted to use, Lafayette used to being patient when it came to his younger brother. Finally, after Lafayette was done eating and Alex was still working on it, he finally cracked. "I think I want to be adopted." The smile that broke out on Lafayette's face could put the sun to shame. He looked positively giddy at the news, beaming from ear to ear, and encouraged him to continue. "I got, well, I was shocked last night. No one has ever through out adoption as a potential option for me, not even my old case worker." Alex started. "I just...gave up thinking about it to be honest." 

"You are not hopeless and those that thought that not adopting you was smart are wrong. We've always wanted you, Alex, we always knew that you belonged here, with us. To see you leave and be placed with another family would break us I fear." Lafayette replied. Alex chewed and swallowed down the last of his pancake. Martha had only given him one, knowing that coming off of a bad night he couldn't stomach down a large meal, and that made him feel warm inside. She was the first adult in a long time to take notice of his little ticks and figure out what worked best for him. His weight was still and issue, and would probably continue to be for a while yet, but he was healthy. He could actually sleep through the night which was something he hadn't been able to do in years. If he left the Washington's he might never get that back. Alex knew that there were happy times he spent with his mother, and he struggled to recall them. With the Washington's he could build new ones.

"It's just hard to get used to it, is all." Alex muttered. "I like being here. I like talking to George about the political topics that make you and Martha roll your eyes. I like helping Martha out around the house or going on errands with her. I like being around you." He looked up, startled to see tears in Lafayette's eyes, and his mood dropped. Maybe he had misunderstood. Maybe Lafayette didn't want him here even though he just said that him leaving would crush them. "You are not leaving us, mon ami. Never, ever, you are staying here." Lafayette said, manhandling him until he was curled up next to him. Alex, well used to this position, leaned against Lafayette, grateful for the contact. Of course it was silly to think that Lafayette wouldn't want him. God, their first meeting had set the tone for the rest of their relationship. "Martha and George only wanted to make sure you were in a better place before suggesting it to you. Now seemed like a good time, Alex, to ask."

"Better place?" Alex asked. Lafayette brushed back his hair. "You were scared, Alex. For the first few weeks you wouldn't let anyone close, were always tired and fidgety, never letting anyone see what was going on inside your head. You worried about anything and were terrified to ask us for anything. You're beginning to trust us more, Alex, and that's why George and Martha decided to ask you now as opposed to earlier. You weren't ready, mon petit Alex, and now they feel that you can make the decision with the evidence to back it up." Alex nodded along with what he was saying. The Washington's had treated him well, better than anyone had, and now all they wanted was to be able to do that for the rest of their life. They wanted to keep Alex around, not because it benefited them, but because they cared too much about him to let someone else try. Or worse, let someone else try and mess it up. Alex didn't want to go back to a time before the Washington's. In fact, he could leave New York altogether. 

There was nothing there left for him. There was nothing left for him on the island. Any family he might have had was long gone. He hadn't had the chance, or the desire, to make friends with other individuals in the system. All he wanted to do was get through with as much of himself still intact. The Washington's were helping to put back those broken pieces. "Do you think they expect an answer right away?" Alex whispered. He didn't want to keep them waiting, but this decision was the biggest of his life. He never got a say in a lot of things. This, however, this was something that he could decide for himself. "I just want to give it the right amount of time to think about it, that's all." Alex rushed to explain, hoping that his hesitance wasn't being perceived as reluctance. Lafayette rubbed his back, swaying lightly from side to side until he felt Alex begin to relax again. "You can take as much time as you want, Alex. Martha and George will not rush you, either, they just want you to be happy."

Being happy was a foreign concept to Alex. He must have been, at one time in his life, but he didn't recall at time of being happy in the States. Like many things, that had been ripped away from him. Now, he had plently of memories of being happy with the Washington's. He had moments of being happy with John, Hercules, and the girls. He could be happy for longer periods. And the best part was that he didn't owe anyone for it. He could be happy and they would be happy with him. So, he and Lafayette sat together, not talking, lost in their own thoughts. Alex didn't sleep, but Lafayette drifted off, held up by the wall. "I want to be adopted." Alex whispered into Lafayette's shirt. "I want to be adopted by the Washington's and stay here. I want to stay here with you." Alex relaxed, free of a weight he didn't even know he was carrying, and let his eyes close. Had he been looking up, he would have seen the smile on Lafayette's face. The Washington's were about to become a family of four.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a day late, but here it is! Read and enjoy peeps!


	15. Ten Duel Commandments

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex gets signed up for school.

It was not as if Alex did not want to go to school at this point. In reality, he was excited, probably more than his brother, and more than John and Hercules for sure. Both boys seemed saddened that winter break was coming to a close, and with it, their small window for freedom. The long nights spent watching movies, going to the mall or other stores, even just hanging out on the couch for hours doing nothing was ending. Alex did not mind that; he missed the feeling of being in a classroom. He had always loved learning, wanting to know more and more, and with the belief that he might be able to stay in a school for longer than a few weeks, he wanted to start as soon as possible. The Washington's had told him that they would be taking him on Monday to sign up, as part as the process for getting adopted, and then he would start that week with Lafayette. He was thrilled. His older brother, which he never got tired of saying, was reluctant to let him out of his sight for longer periods and it showed. 

"Peggy will be in my class, right Laf?" Alex asked as he helped dry the dishes. Lafayette nodded as he scrubbed out one of the pots used from making dinner. 

"Oui, and she is very excited. Of course, we all have the same lunch period, and we can see one another in the halls between classes." As he handed Alex the pot he grinned. "Or, we can play hooky and see each other more often." Alex laughed, which was becoming a common sound in the house, one that had everyone happy for. Alex was coming out of his shell more and more, feeling secure in the idea that he could grow here, that the floor would not be pulled out from underneath him as it had been so many times. 

"I won't sneak out of class. I want to learn, Laf, not get in trouble." Alex said. Lafayette nodded, gently nudging his shoulder, before going back to the sink. He knew that Alex did not like the idea of breaking rules. He still held the fear that he would get punished. He still flinched if someone moved too quickly around him. 

On the counter, Alex's phone went off. That had been the newest item that the Washington's had given to him. George had gone out, knowing that having the prices where Alex could see them would be stressful, and presented it to him after dinner. Alex had been surprised, and after being assured for several minutes that he did not have to pay them back, he started to play with the phone. Lafayette had programed everyone's numbers into it, along with some other apps, showing his patiently how to use it. John had been the first one to text him and the two had been going back and forth since. There were some people that he had yet to message, such as Aaron or Thomas, simply because he had not met them in person. It was strange to text someone without talking to them first. "Someone is clearly trying to get your attention." Laf teased as the phone went off again. John had it so bad for his little brother. Alex, even if he did not say much about it, certainly liked the other boy.

"John has been sending me these funny videos. And memes. Just about anything that makes him laugh he sends it to me." Alex explained. There was a faint blush on his cheeks and Laf was thrilled. Alex was almost totally different than when he first arrived. "I like them. No one has done that before." 

"What text you constantly?" Laf asked. Alex shook his head as he put the last dish away. 

"No, send me things just to make me smile." Alex looked down but Lafayette caught the shy smile on his lips. Oh yes, Alex definetly favored John. 

"You deserve that, Alex, and John is taking full advantage of it." Laf stated. The two of them hung out for the rest of the night, Alex going upstairs a few hours later, as he was driving with George to the local high school in the morning. Laf stayed up a bit later than that, texting his friends, and it wasn't long before he got sucked into the group chat with Hercules, Aaron, John, and Thomas. John Adams, Thomas's boyfriend, was likely already asleep. 

{I know that school is not anyone's idea of fun but it's adorable to see Alex this excited} -L 

{Well, duh, he's going with us!!!} -H

{You do know that he won't be in class with us, right? Peggy said that she'll look after him} -A

{Do we finally get to meet him??? I've had my ear talked off about his by Angie and I want to meet him finally} -T

{Yes, Thomas you can meet him. And Peggy did mention that she's been talking to Alex more.} -L

{We can still see him a lot and you're going to love him, Thomas, he's the best!!!} -J

{John, you giant flaming crush is on display again} -H

{SHUT UP HERC} -J

Lafayette was giggling at the antics of his friends, and knew that John was bright red at this point. He didn't want to rush into things, escpecially not with that Alex had gone through, and he was not willing to jeopardize his friendship. So, John vented his crush to his friends and kept his steady friendship with Alex. Lafayette knew that John would break eventually. 

Alex was a bundle of nerves in the morning. Martha had to pressure him into eating, and he only managed half of his breakfast before leaving. George drove slowly, neither of them in a rush, and Alex was fiddling with his hands as he sat in the passanger seat. He had grown more comfortable with George, the annoucement of adoption had helped, and now he was able to be around the older man more often without worrying. 

"Are there any classes that you are excited about?" George asked. Alex shrugged.

"I like history. Maybe some of the math classes." Alex looked out the window as the other cars went by. "I never got the chance to have a favorite class." There were a lot of things that Alex never got the chance to have. The poor kid was excited about school, something the majorty of children his age dreaded, simply because that was an area that was always changing as well. Now, he had a stable home life, friends that were thrilled to be with him, and a case manager that gave a damn about the kids on her caseload. 

"Well, I know that they've got a good history department, and the math classes are good. If you get stuck I'm sure Lafayette can help you. He might tell you otherwise but he is good when it comes to math." George said. Alex nodded. The office was empty when they got in. Alex, leery of new places, stayed close to George's side as he talked to the receptionist. There were lots of forms to fill out, and sign, and then came the time when Alex had to get his class schedule and locker. He was enrolled in algebra, world history, computer science, gym, spanish, biology and 3D design. He perked up, knowing that 3D design was an elective, and both Hercules and Eliza were in it. They found his locker, tucked away on the second floor, and George helped him find the rooms where he would have class. The drive home was much more relaxing and Alex took a picutre of the paper schedule and sent it to the group chat he was a part of. The responses were immediate. 

Eliza was over the moon that they had a class together was already sending him links on what to buy for supplies. John told him all the best ways to get to his classes, how to open his locker, and not to buy a lock because he had a spare one. Everyone gave him advice, which led to his phone going off constantly for several minutes and George chuckling as he drove. Lafayette was waiting up for him when they got home, asking for his schedule the moment he walked through the door, and began to nod at some of the classes or frown at others. "These teachers are good, you'll love Mrs. Bernardi for biology, the rest are alright. If anyone gets on your case, let Aaron know; he's on good terms with all the teachers and he can help you out. He's done it before for new students." Alex grinned, a bit overwhelmed, and let his brother go on talking. Martha was smiling as well, intergetting here and there, asking if Alex wanted to go out to pick up a new bookbag or school supplies. 

He said yes this time, trusting the Washington's on their word, and Martha said that they would go out later that day. Lafayette wanted to go. George, having to go into the office, told them all to have fun. John kept texting him throughout the day, asking him questions, making sure he was doing alright, and generally letting him know that he was happy that Alex would be in school with them soon. Peggy had asked if they could Facetime later that night; she wanted to talk to him and Eliza and Angelica had too many questions to text. All of it made him feel good inside. These people wanted him here. As he walked around the store, Martha pointing out this and that, Lafayette going ahead and selecting things that Alex might like and would make the final choice on, he had a smile on the entire time. He wasn't sure if he had ever smiled this much. He even took some pictures and sent them back to John. They were some pointless things, like some of the designs on the notebooks, or funnier ones, like Lafayette looking serious as he sorted through the basket with warmer hats. 

There was a meeting with Maria this weekend, one where she wanted all four of them present for, and Alex was hopeful about it. Martha and George were serious about going through a second adoption and had been in good standing when they did it with Lafayette. Alex even had good things to tell Maria about! She was still hinting at the idea of getting him a therapist, which made him uncomfortable, as he did not like sharing things that made him vulnerable. In addition, many memories, and the older injuries that went with them, tended to send him into either an anxiety or panic attack. He still had them just not as often as he did in the past or since moving in with the Washington's. He knew that Martha and George were worried, though, given how many nightmares he had and his lack of eating. Sometimes Alex still shut down when he was overwhelmed. Once or twice he curled up under he bed to sleep. 

But he was getting better. He just had to let it get better first.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This week was rough (It's only Tuesday I know) and I'm a bit behind with posting. So, this story and buzzfeed unsolved is being uploaded. Also, Stan Lee is gone :( RIP you wonderful person.


	16. Meet Me Inside

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alex has a meeting with Maria. Someone from the past finally shows up.

Alex was never sure how to feel when he walked into Maria's office. It was certainly built with the idea of offering a sense of comfort to the person inside. There was a giant couch, lots of pillows, and a box of toys in the corner. Alex assumed that it was for the younger children Maria worked with. There was a desk with big, leather chairs, and a small coffee maker. Maria always asked if Alex wanted anything to eat or drink before starting the meeting; it had taken them four sessions before he got enough courage to ask for a coffee. So, here he was, seated on the big, cloth couch, clutching his coffee, waiting for Maria to start. She was seated at the other end of the couch, giving him plenty of space, as sometimes Alex grew panicked with someone being to close to him. It had gotten better, but seeing as how he did not see Maria on a regular basis, and usually one of his foster parents was with him, his body still couldn't fully relax around her. Maria never held that against him. She just went with whatever Alex needed to feel safe with her. 

"Before we start off with all of the boring stuff," Maria began. "How are things going, Alex?" They always started off their meetings with a check in. It wasn't anything major, nothing like how he pictured it, and while it did remind him of a therapy session, it was nice. Maria was looking out for him, even though it was her job, and she always kept Alex's best intentions at the top of her list. She wanted him to succeed, be happy, and above all else, safe. She ferocity to protect him left him winded most days. "I've been good. I'm signed up for school now, the same one that Lafayette goes to, and so do the rest of his friends." Well, some were his friends now too, but it was strange to think that he had his own. Past Alex never had any friends, never got a chance to make them, and even if he did manage to strike up a conversation with someone, nothing ever came from it. "I think school will be good. I like my classes so far." 

Granted, he hadn't started yet, but he was thrilled either way. Peggy had been talking to him non-stop since he was enrolled, she had plans for them to sit together in class, was already suggesting creating a study group, and asked him if he wanted to get involved in any clubs. Alex was delaying the last part for now. There was going to be a lot going on and he still struggled with larger groups. Maybe after he had gotten used to the school, or even used to the rest of his anticipated friends, he would join a club. George and Martha would like that. They were worried that he spent too much time in his room, and the few instances that he did go out, it was because Lafayette had planned something for them. He had yet to initiate his own adventure. So, maybe a club was in his future, if it was small enough. "They've been treating you well?" That was another thing. Maria had been furious when she had found out that Marcus, his previous case worker, knew about the abuse and had barely done anything. And if he had, it was after the fact.

"They have been. Martha thinks we need to go back to the doctor, she still says I'm too thin, and George agrees. But I've been sleeping better, and last week I only had two panic attacks. George...I was able to have George in the room with me for the last one." That was huge; excluding the first one he had when he arrived at the Washington's, George hadn't been allowed to help Alex through a panic attack. Now that he was able to showed how much Alex trusted him. "I like living with them." Alex finished. He always finished with that. He wanted Maria to know that he didn't want to leave. That the Washington's were the best family he had ever been placed with. Maria smiled at him. "I'm glad that you do, Alex. From what I hear from the Washington's, they love having you. If they could adopt you this second they would." The adoption process would take awhile. Maria said that the average time period was about a year, sometimes less if you had someone good helping you. 

And Maria was good at her job. She wanted Alex to be adopted as soon as possible, if not for her own sake of mind. Plus, the Washington's had a lot going for them, so the process might be quicker if they were lucky. They then began to talk about the upcoming process, that the Washington's would be coming in within the next week to fill out the next round of paperwork. There was going to be a home visit to ensure that the environment was safe, and some interviews for the adults. Maria was thorough with her paperwork, not wanting to miss anything, or give out a chance that the adoption might be denied. If it was, Alex would be crushed. He was hopeful that this would work out. Then came the next topic. Alex had been skirting around the idea of therapy. He wasn't sure if it was a good thing, or just another way for him to feel weak, but Maria always brought it up. They had gotten a list of recommended therapists, some that specialized in working with traumatized children. 

Alex did not see himself as traumatized. He honestly thought that all the bad things that had happened to home were done because he deserved it. So, Maria suggested the idea of going to talk to someone who was objective. "I know that you aren't sold on going, Alex, and I don't blame you. It can be scary to talk about what you've lived through." Maria said. "I don't think that it's a good idea to keep all of it bottled up. The therapist would work to help you, no judgement." It was the same speech as always. Alex nodded, said he would consider it, and that was that. Maria didn't push, knowing that trying to get Alex to do something he didn't want was a sure way to get him to pull back into himself. His cues were hidden, but over the past few months they were learning them quick. She wondered if Martha and George saw more of his cues than she did; most likely, and then she wondered how they dealt with them. Alex was hard to read sometimes, still reluctant to talk about himself. 

"Martha wants me to try it." Alex said as he was getting on his coat. George was waiting in the office room, willing to give Alex his privacy, and he never asked Alex to say what they talked about. "She thinks it would be good for me." Maria waited patiently for Alex to continue. "I...I want to try it, sometimes, but I don't want to talk about it. What I've experienced. I tried to tell Lafayette about it, once, but it was hard. I didn't like it." Well, he was trying to reach out to someone. Maybe he was intimidated by the idea of spewing his guts to an older person. "Some of the therapists on the list are younger, if you don't want to talk to an individual who is older. Maybe a female therapist?" Maria asked. Alex was skittish around unfamiliar males. Perhaps since most of his abusers have been male; there was the one woman, but Alex didn't respond badly to the majority of females. He assumed that the males could do more damage and had been proven right dozens of times. 

"I think you should go through the list. Pick out a couple you think would be easier to talk to. And then we can go from there." Alex nodded and Maria let him finish putting on his coat. She walked him out to the reception area, seeing George talking to the secretary and gave Alex a kind smile as she stopped. "I'll talk to you soon, okay? You have my number saved to your phone, right?" Alex nodded, and even pulled it up to show her. She reiterated that he could call her at any time, for anything, no questions asked. Usually, she gave her kids a hug, but Alex wasn't quite there yet. She waved as he left the building with George, hoping that he would consider the therapist. It wasn't that she believed Alex was a danger to himself, rather, Alex seemed like the type to let things build up inside of him. His nightmares were something to witness, according to George, and they often left him exhausted for the remainder of the day. The panic and anxiety attacks could be better managed as well. The pediatrician suggested anti-anxiety medication, to which Alex refused. 

He didn't want to rely on the pills is what he told his foster parents. Lafayette tried to explain it better to him, but it didn't get anywhere. Alex was firm in his belief that he didn't need to talk to anyone and that a bunch of little pills couldn't fix him. It was an improvement that he was willing to talk about going to see a counselor. Maybe the next time Maria had him in her office he would have decided to go. It was a nice idea to think of. The rest of the day went slowly. She made some calls, talked to a couple of her co-workers, and generally did her best. Which is why she was floored when one of the aides came in to tell her that a male at the front desk was requesting her. Puzzled, she walked down the hall and frowned. The man standing there was disheveled, clearly annoyed to be kept waiting so long, and Maria stiffened. 

"Can I help you sir?" She asked politely. He snapped up to look at her. 

"Ya," There was a thick accent to his works. "I heard you have the whereabouts of my son." Maria frowned. 

"Sir, I can't give out that information-"

"Tell me where Alexander is." He demanded. "Tell me where my son is." And Maria's heart dropped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> School is coming to a close (finally). Hope everyone is staying warm and healthy (I think I have a cold)… also 27 days till Christmas!

**Author's Note:**

> Leave a comment if you so choose!


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